Ed's Top 360 Users of 2009

Ed made a huge ass user list like everyone else, and the mere mention of Ulti equals an auto-deletion of this page!

Introduction
Lifted from Icehawk, who took Smurf's idea and made an art out of it.

Here's the 360 users I felt made enough of an impact on me personally throughout 2009 to write a few sentences (or, in some cases, paragraphs) about. Like Icehawk, this is solely being judged off 2009. I already did my top 60 favorite users earlier this year; this is a different list because, as the Steiner-appointed KING OF BOARD 8, I am the arbiter of objective user quality. Basically, if I could decide User of the Year, here's how I'd like it to go down.

This is pretty much a glorified "talks about the users" topic, in as much depth and scathing criticism as I can muster. Should be fun!

'''360. MichaelWClark
Write-up currently missing, since the post was modded.

'''359. Ulti

Write-up removed.

'''358. Albion

Oh, Albion. Albion, Albion, Albion. If Board 8 was a high school (and in many respects it kind of is), Albion would be that one kid who always tags along and never shuts up. Albion has a few things he will incessantly make topics about it – game lists/critical rankings, sales, Vault Boy. They're not bad in and of themselves, but when he makes damn near 20 topics a day, most of them about the same thing... yeah.

Albion also took Cyclo's account... was it this year? Last year? I don't really remember. This doesn't really bother me (accounts are... y'know, accounts), but it's worth mentioning since to some people that was the worst thing Albion did all year. My argument is that Albion just posting regularly outclasses that. >_>

Albion also has a propensity to derail topics into something much, much worse. Take, for example, Seg's topic about Win Ben Stein's Money, praising it for being an awesome show. Albion comes in and is all “Ben Stein has stupid Republican views.” Cue political arguing. Man, even SmartMuffin isn't that bad about derailing good topics politically.

'''357. joyrock

If Albion the king of infuriating topics, joyrock is the king of infuriating posts. His argument style, as perfectly emulated a week or so ago on the board, consists of making bold statements and then either refusing to defend them or just repeating “No, try again, kid” ad nauseum. He does this with music, movies, and any other topic he feels strongly enough about, and he does it everywhere.

It also translates into his board mafia play. In the one game I watched him in, MGS Mafia Pt. 2, scum just left him alive because he was basically taking up all of the attention in the game by virtue of flat-out refusing to contribute and simply repeating that people were stupid, were missing the point, were overrated, etc., over and over again. Not cool.

'''356. SvenGeorgeson

Everybody's favorite movie/grammar troll! Sven (otherwise known as WormtailVolt, or, if you want to go back a ways, antijuggalo) loves popping into topics and casually correcting people for trivial mistakes. The dude's apparently in film school and knows a bunch of movie stars; how much of this is true and how much is blatant trolling we leave up to the imagination of our fair readers.

Sven is also apparently one of the big lolicon fans on the board, and he might be even creepier about it than Omega is, which says a lot right there. (And I just realized Albion is too. You guys should throw a party!)

'''355. MegaWentEvil

When he was MegaMaverickHunter, his big gimmick was repeatedly talking about how Sonic and friends don't wear clothes and how that is shameful and disgraceful. This was every bit as lame as it sounds. Now his gimmick is being a big message marker and “sticking up” for gay people at every opportunity; by “sticking up” I mean he'll just pop into a topic where somebody casually mentions something about not liking dudes and then he'll quote the message and go THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING GAY. Don't get me wrong: as a gay man I am all about people sticking up for that kind of stuff, but it's obvious he's not sincere about it. Plus he's really into marking ToU violations that don't bother anyone, which is pretty lame.

'''354. lol internet

I used to like lol internet's strange blend of Alex Shelley-esque non sequiturs and off-topic posting. Call me crazy, but I did. Then he started being a bit more... er, open and honest about his personal life. Now it seems like we can't go a day without an lol internet topic (always on some weird Pokemon account) notifying us about his unrequited love for a girl, or his failed attempts at having sex, or something of that nature. Some people find these entertaining. I am not one of them.

'''353. SenorHouseMouse

The one notable thing this dude did was steal that one guy's account – and even that I didn't think was all that funny. Since then, SHM posts a lot to remind us all about how he is, in Icehawk's words, a “community college superstar,” in addition to having the world's fastest ringtime at his grocery store. As with MegaWentEvil, I have nothing against such things in principle, just when they're posted in an obviously fake manner.

'''352. Black Turtle

It's contest season, and that means we can all look forward to the return of Black Turtle. Joy of joys. This dude's main posting style consists of belittling the opinions of others with a hearty “lol ____” and then refusing to back down on whatever position he's happened to acquire. He absolutely refuses to admit when he's wrong with a stubbornness bordering on impossibility, and when he is wrong – as happens rather frequently – he blames it on other people. BT has absolutely no class and is only not lower on the list because he didn't post all that much this year.