NGirl's Tales of Symphonia playthrough

Part 1
I'm watching the albeit very pretty intro scene and I think I'm at 5 or 6 characters who I can't tell the gender of. Possibly more. I look at custom and am astounded that the game wants to offer me the options of choosing the colour of the message box. Seriously? Whatever.

START! I say yes to skit titles but what's the best battle system? Semi-auto or Manual? I assume that Auto is for lamer babies.

Guff about angels and then... I'm Lloyd Irving! They're "teaching" Lloyd the story. Collette is the chosen one. ALLEGEDLY! Professor Raine leaves to see angels or Oracles or Priests or something and I get to talk to everyone. No-one says anything useful. At this point I'm guessing either the Chosen One gets their brains eaten out/explodes into magic dust and/or is secretly not Collette. I examine a hole to be told that it's an odd hole. That I can't do anything with. Huh.

Lloyd: Are you interested in it? Collette: You are Lloyd: Yeah... Collette: So I am too.

-_-

Midget Genis joins the party as well as Collette who will clearly be my love interest despite being 13. I talk to everyone again and they give me a Magic Lens and the hole tells me Collette is a Klutz. Okay then! I leave and Collette's dad tells me the Desians who are the evil race of dobadders are charging to the Temple. I explore the village and then get into a fight. I look on blindly for a bit as stuff happens waiting for a tutorial or something. After a bit I run up and bash A to attack the thing and then jump over his head somehow and hit it again from the other side and then I win. Okay... Then there's a flashing Y so I push Y and get told I successfully made a sandwich.

At this point I am very confused.

Part 2
I apologize. It's the X button for sandwich. I do it again after being told how to switch targets for the second battle. 9 combo! Also, I just found a "memory circle". I kill a rabbit and a gull thing after entering the field and finding out encounters aren't random. THANK GOD. I fail at sandwich making. But rabbits make good sandwiches. :(

Eventually it stops asking me to make sandwiches. I don't know why. Or what it did. Or anything at all really. I am losing health fast so I go heal at Frank and then go to fight some more. LEVEL UP! Still no clue what's going on. After more fightin Lloyd dies and I think I'm controlling someone else? Or just watching. But I can press R and Y and something happens I think, ma,ybe. I go heal at Frank again. Maybe I can keep doing this till level 50 and eventually blunder my way through.

I didn't know I had any ingredients! But yeah, now I'm wandering Collette around the map but still controlling Lloyd in battle. At DYL's advice I make Colette a Klutz. Genis levels up and shortly after gains a skill or a spell or something. *shrug* I have what appears to be a good fight with it telling me I got a skill counter and then a no hit counter and then a not hit continue and I have no idea what any of these mean or how I'm doing them or what it means for my experience, health or sandwich making abilities.

BUT NEVER MIND!

After not that far really, I reach the temple.We notice a "commotion". Maybe because the bad guys are there? A priest wanders out holding his chest. I think he's about to die after giving me instructions to save the world. Sorry a Pastor. XFD Absolutely bang on.

"Go chat to the Oracle." "Hold on Pastor" "No use, he's gone."

Blah blah desians, we run towards them. We're told to run and hey guess what the Desians want us dead. Because we're going to heal the world of them or something. Definitely a stupid count.

Party is stupid: 1

I fight some "desians". Oh dear. The plot isn't going to be a little bit simple is it. I'm really destined to bring the desians back to the world forever. I win and then fight Mace Guy. Lloyd goes down and I decide to use the Magic Lens thing I got on him and get told he's really strong and then a cutscene starts and the guy they want me to think is a badass shows up. Everyone dies anyway. I watch badass dude attack him for a while. Getting bored now. He loses.

No one ever heard from them again.

Well damn. :(

Part 3
I grind for an indiscriminate point of time till I feel I'm ready to try again an head to the temple once more. I feel like a massive noob for needing to do so in what is probably still the introduction. His ass is easily kicked this time as I combo him to 9 lots and find the guard button. He breaks my guard lots but I feel I am learnding.

Huzzah for NGirl.

Badass guy is apparently well known to the probably-not-Desians.

Oh. His name is Kratos. Aurion it is then. Still no idea if he's a' good guy or not. I guess the story will reveal all! He has a shiny ring. An exdeath or exsphere or something. I haven't been paying that much attention. He is apparently a mercenary. He tells Lloyd he's a burden and then Colette gets all cutesy and asks for his permission to stay. Eugh.

To the trial! A training manual from Kratos! Yessss. I now know what I'm doing in combat. I'd basically got all the stuff in it now, but I probably never would have worked out sidestep stuff. I explore the Temple, killing ghosts and zombies easily before reaching a puzzle! It's about fighting a Golem and pushing him down a hole. Lots. Eventually I push him down the hole he'd already fallen down and he sticks.

On the second golem dude I get a 12 hit combo whch means I'm good enough to be a COMBO NEWBIE! I grab the magic ring and all the bonus chesty side path treasures. I even find a save point on the lower floor and a fallen roof with some chests nearby. I then discover you can stun the enemies with the ring, but kill them all anyway. EXP is good. I blast the magic doow with the magic ring and teleport to the top of the magic tower. Lots of magic around huh?

An angel appears and inserts a glowy thing into Colette's chest. Wonder if it'll blow up eventually? Colette is now officially branded as the Chosen One. Unlock seals, climb to heaven, blah blah. Each temple, Colette gets more Angely and more magic. Colette finds out that her real father is an Angel and that Frank was an imposter!

Lloyd doesn't care and Genis already knew the rumour. I bet the whole village knew except Lloyd. He seems ignorant. I leave the top of the tower after a whole bunch of skits and Professor Raine literally slaps Genis across the ass repeattedly before backhanding Lloyd across the room. o.0

Another couple of skits later are developing Lloyd's character nicely and I return to the village, save and quit, at least for a bit. Pretty good start, though the game is sorely missing a series of tutorials because I would have no idea about statuses or cooking or anything if you guys hadn't told me. ===Part 4=== I run around the village talking to people and findi out that Genis is Raine's brother and that they're both elves. And Genis earns the title CARING BROTHER or something like that. Raine says she's goinbg with Colette. I'm guessing she's our next party member then! Also Lloyd is a Dwarf. "k" I go to Colette's house and they give me a collector's book.

Kratos shuts us out of the adventure like any sane adult would do in any RPG ever. Colette follows us out and falls on her ass. Oh and it's also Colette's brithday. Just out of nowhere. Genis baked cookies! Lloyd forgot about his present. Bad move. Genis calls him on it and Lloyd admits he's done **** all.

I try to magic ring the villagers but nothing happens. We go to Genis' house to get SANDWICH INGREDIENTS. Awww yeah. A TUTORIAL ON COOKING. Booo yah. The way I am reading this then. Lloyd likes sandwiches with Beef, Greens, Cucumber and Lemon. ****ing weirdo.

Lloyd has a pet mutated dog called Noishe. I imagine it will have some relevance to the story later. Maybe. Also Genis has clearly been playing at the ranch. Or steaing things from it. Or sleeping with one of the girls in it. Something anyway. Let's go home Noishe. The game clearly told me to go NW, so I go the other way and kill some dudes, sandwich making merrily along my way till eventually Lloyd won't let me go any further. I kill more wasps and wolves and whatever before going back to the villaghe, buying lots more bread and then into the forest. Noishe runs away like a scared dog "ololol" and I find a couple of chests before we find out via skit that Genis has been hiding food in his bag for a human friend. FROM THE HUMAN FARM PERHAPS? Man subtle guys, really ****ing subtle.

Whatever.

Lloyd learns a new technique which involves stabbing things a lot. Like all his other techniques really. Andf then Genis says he's going to the ranch. Le sigh. Humans are ranched as slaves rather than cattle. Oh. :( We chat to the old woman Genis has a crush on before some guards see her and take her to the back.

"This doesn't look good. They're taking her to the back."

Seriously Lloyd?

They're whipping her. Lloyd suggests attacking them from range. Genis says that might get them in trouble. -.- He agrees though and gives me cookies to fully heal myself before attacking.

Party is stupid count: 2

Genis trips over his own feet. Then yells "Ow".

Party is supid count: 3

Lloyd attacks them both head on.

Party is stupid count: 4

After I win, I make a superhuman jump off the cliff as Genis escapes and we both agree to go home. But apparently the Desian Gate had A SURVEILLANCE CAMERA!? I go home through a forest of monsters and on other side talk to my dog before calling him weird. Lloyd is crazy. When I get home I find out his Mum is dead and the grave is on their front garden. Creepy much? Also RPG Cliche GET!

Lloyd's father top tier accent. My Exsphere is also the One Exsphere to rule them all apparently. Probably.

Man, his Dad isn't his Dad either. So Lloyd is a Secret Desian. I guess he didn't look very Dwarfy... Angst time! Child beating time! I leave and there's a bunch of people listening to my families issues.

Lloyd: "This sort of thing is special because you get it on your brithday"

Yeah, that's the whole point of a Birthday Present Lloyd. Well done. Everyone leaves, Lloyd makes the present and I save and quit. ===Part 5===

I worked out how to make Genis make sandwiches! It looks like he has 5/7 stars in cooking and Lloyd has 5/5. So I will cook with Genis for a bit and see if he improves, because I think Lloyd only had 4 at one point

I leave the house and wander over to my not-Dad and he gives me the Crest I asked for. Then I tell him I'm going with Collette to avenge my mum.

"Yeah, I guessed as much."

He gives me stuff for the journey. Genis shows up and tells me I missed everyone leaving the village. "lol"

Stupid count: 5

I go to Phaidra's and they give me a letter from Colette. Apparently she gave me the wrong time, so I guess that Stupid count is a little unfair. I'll remove it. There is something they didn't tell the Village. The Chosen is already... BIG RUMBLY SOUND!

It's alright though, I covered this in my very first update.

From: nintendogirl1 | #039 the Chosen One gets their brains eaten out/explodes into magic dust

I run outside and Desians are burning down the village! I see if I can go back to the Temple area but the game doesn't let me. I save the dude outside the school and in passing his house Genis mentions that he and Raine are secret Gypsies who have chosen the village to finally settle down in.

There still not really Desians I think. Or they are. I don't know. Maybe I'm a Desian. Or the Chosen is evil. **** if I can work it out yet, but they've not hidden the fact that there's going to be a twist very well. And from experience, twists work better if you're not expecting them.

They want me to fight that thing!?

After many items including 2 Life Bottles I win. And successfully make sandwich. And in doing so reveal my Exsphere. The one my mother died for. ****.

The ugly thing I just killed takes Lord Forsomething hostage and tells me to run away. Uhhh.... I thought it sounded like Marble, so apparently that's what happens when Exspheres touch flesh. She explodes. I think we got her Exsphere though, so that's okay. The explosion causes the Maybedesians to retreat and then the village blame me for the fire and cast me out. Even though it was really Genis' fault.

Oh. And Genis is exiled too. Good, at least the punishment isn't hypocritical. Yeah, we did get the Exsphere and as I guessed we're going to use Dirk's Crest and put it on Genis. I become a DRIFTING SWORDSMAN. Do I get to become VYSE THE LEGEND at the end of the game?

Looking at stats and since I'm a bit **** I take the HP and Def bonus over the Str and Acc of COMBO NEWB. I leave the village and see a machinng over where there was no machine thing before. It describes itself as Nova's Caravan and I can heal and save there. Huzzah. I head south and Noishe chases mke and then Howls rather than whines.

He has a letter from Dirk in his mouth which is now too slobbery to read. Or not. He tells me how to use Ex Gems. YES! You guys can stop rambling about things I don't understand now. I have a brief look and decide I'm happy with where it is. I continue heading South and discover an EX Gem hidden in the brush and equip it to Lloyd. He now has Strength and Tough Level 1. I note they're both "S" EX Skills. WHETHER THAT'S A GOOD THING OR NOT. NYAA NYAA~

A battle later he learns a compound skill. Aw yeah, I am god at this stuff. <_______<

I find the House of Salvation. Genis says to talk to the guy I was trying to talk to. Thanks buddy, really useful. He tells me how to use Long-Range mode and I wander into the House of Salvation itself where loyd and Genis have a philosophical debate on why Desians as the cause of all evil exist. Without the philosophy and with extra whining. I go upstairs for a nap and after the old hag there tells me it costs 100 Gald. HA! As if, I'll walk back to the caravan if I need to heal. Which I do...

Oh wells. It's not that far.

I heal and then head off into the desert and find the Sylvarant Base. But there is a sandstorm there so I am forced to go away. Instead I go to Triet which looks like an Oasis, or was at least built by one. Which is pretty smart really. OH DAMN! Wanted posters of me.

I go through all the shops upgrading equipments and buying new weapons. I talk to the cat people but I decide I can probably live without them and don't buy any Gems yet. I have 60 Grade though which is nice to know I guess. I go chat to the Fortune teller next who charges me 100 Gald and is a fraud. I leave and Genis tells me to look at the Wanted poster. So I do. Then I try to leave again, but this time the Desians stop me. I apparently get "Over the limit" in that fight and afterwards I become a TETRA MASTER. And then as Lloyd brags about how easy the fight was, he gets zapped from behind and Genis folds like a wimp.

The Desians take the party prisoner and Noishe sees. Right... Then they let Genis free. Tards.

The door is apparently unlocked and they left me the Magic Ring from the temple so I hit the guard with it and he runs away. Knowing that my cell is apparently unlocked. I repeat. Tards. I open the chests around collecting a Beast Hide and my equipment and then save.

Part 6
Resuming, I run around a corner straight into some guards who ask me who I am. As if that matters in a high security prison. After I beat them an alarm triggers which apparently does nothing. The next room has a thing that changes the Magic Ring to electricity instead of fire and has a really obnoxious "puzzle" that involves electrocuting enemies at exactly the right time. I get through it eventually and find a chest and vending machine room before another puzzle with a Gamecube in the middle oif the room. "k"

I mess around with the pillars for a bit before leaving having opened the control room. A cutscene is invoked where I run into a room and meet a mustache-wearing figure. Clearly a villain. I exsphere myself at him because revealing yourself as an escaped prisoner is a really smart idea.

Party is stupid count: 5

Oh hey, they remembered the alarm. Moustache leaves as more maybedesians turn up shortly followed by Genis, Colette and Kratos. I defeat the minion dude "Botta" in what was a pretty easy battle, though Genis died to a bigassed Stalagmite to the head. Botta drops his weapon with an Exsphere on it and runs away, man people treat these things like pennies. Raine shows up as well and tells me she's opened the way out. Freedom!

Awesome! I just worked out how to do tech skills! B instead of A. Only took me... 4 hours. Followed by a 21 hit combo. Man I'm killing this game now. I go to Triet and we go to the Inn where we discover Raine has a junky Key Crest that Lloyd can repair. Fade to black and it's done and I wander over to Colette's room. And wish I hadn't. AUGH such awful clichéd sappy drivel. I visit Raine's room, pinch Genis' nose and then give Raine the Key Crest. As I leave she glows and gets all creepy like. Also I see Kratos sneaking out to go find a prostitute.

Lloyd is clearly in need of some action so I follow him. He's with Noishe! No dude, that's my mutant dog. YOU DO NOT DO THAT SORT OF ****! He nearly slices my neck open and tells me that I'm not to stand behind him, so I assume he prefers to be the giver. Then he tells me my "swordsmanship" is unrefined and next time I'll die if I don't work on it.

The next morning I find a mgic chef who appears in a puff of smoke and ridicules my Sandwiches. :( He tells me to make cabbage rolls instead, yeah like that'll ever happen dude. Ingredients are cabbage and pork. Which he gives me. Coo'. I save on the ground floor of the inn.

Part 7
I leave the inn and Raine gives me the Moster List, which is a Bestiary. I guess that's cool. I look at it and it has no information, yeah I'm not gonna fill that out. I wander around and find a little path to a shiny shimmery ring on the floor which does nothing except start Raine yammering on about magitechnology to no effect. I gather up my **** and head to the Ruins after that. Noishe is whining again, Kratos is whining again, but at least he teaches me Magic Guard. Apparently Noishe ran off again. Who thought it was a good idea to bring a mutant dog on a trip to save the world anyway?

Raine earns the title ARCHEOLOGICAL MANIA. That's not a title, should be maniac IMO. Regardless, I head inside the Ruins to discover a massively difficult battle against a Mimic, which Namcom has ingeniously retitled a "fake". They so clever. It does die eventually, but it took a bunch of Life Bottles and Gels. Inside the central structure I discover a whole temple rock pushing puzzle from three different entrances and moving floors and ****, with chests everywhere as well. I light some torches with the magic ring and reach the memory gem save point, save and warp somewhere.

Raine is still rambling about magitechnology when a huge fire dog exlodes into the room with some smaller fire dog friends. I take it down, but Lloyd doesn't survive the battle. Sads. Regardless, that's the dungeon complete and following a cut-scene, Colette is given wings and learns a new technique called Angel Feathers which cost 20TP. o.0

What've ya got for me now, Lloyd?

I leave the temple and Colette collapses, and her lips turn purple so we set up camp where we are. Later that night I give Colette her birthday present. Which is now broken. HERP. We head to Triet and a short scene occurs.

Raine: Genis, you're going to trip! Genis: No
 * Genis trips*

-.-

Raine earns SISTERLY LOVE. There's nothing else useful in Triet, but I buy some more cooking ingredients, because why not? That's what I thought too. I leave soon after, because there's nothing much to do and take great pleasure in attempting to teach Raine how to cook through trial and error, because the skits that come after she fails are A++.

After lots of aimless running around I eventually find Oosa Trail, when some girl stops us on the way and asks for the "Chosen of Mana".

"Yeah, that's me".

Party is stupid count: 6

How many times do you think she needs to be told that people want her dead. And she then trips over a conveniently placed trap door in the middle of the grass... I run through a very linear path, kill some dudes, open some chests and find a save point.