Hello Board 8, and welcome to another installment of Gauntlet Crew Ranks. In our latest effort, Karo, Inviso, JONA, Scarlet, Prof, and myself ranked the last completed decade of horror films, a list that encompassed the most influential, popular, or otherwise notable horror films of the decade from all different sub-genres and styles. The list included origins of now extended franchises, the current state of classic horror slashers, comedy horror, found footage, torture porn, and more!
The list of films ranked:
American Psycho (2000)
Final Destination (2000)
Scary Movie (2000)
Ginger Snaps (2000)
Session 9 (2001)
The Others (2001)
Jeepers Creepers (2001)
Cabin Fever (2002)
The Ring (2002)
28 Days Later (2002)
House of 1000 Corpses (2003)
Wrong Turn (2003)
Freddy vs. Jason (2003)
Open Water (2003)
Underworld (2003)
Saw (2004)
Dawn of the Dead (2004)
Shaun of the Dead (2004)
Alien vs. Predator (2004)
The Grudge (2004)
The Village (2004)
The Descent (2005)
Wolf Creek (2005)
Hostel (2005)
The Exorcism of Emily Rose (2005)
The Orphanage (2007)
Halloween (2007)
Paranormal Activity (2007)
The Mist (2007)
[Rec] (2007)
Trick ‘r Treat (2007)
Cloverfield (2008)
Let the Right One In (2008)
Martyrs (2008)
The Strangers (2008)
Dead Snow (2009)
Friday the 13th (2009)
Drag Me to Hell (2009)
The Collector (2009)
Zombieland (2009)
Which films proved the most enjoyable by the gauntleteers? The most scary? And everyone's favorite, the most terrible? Find out in Gauntlet Crew Ranks the 2000s in Horror Films.
40. Paranormal Activity (2007) 223 points
Inviso: 32
Karo: 33
Prof: 38
JONA: 40
Scarlet: 40
Snake: 40
I appreciate the fact that this movie made a bunch of money on like, zero budget…but I just didn’t enjoy it. It’s less than ninety minutes long, yet it feels like it’s dragging on almost every second. The scares are just minor creepy things that, yeah, set a horror atmosphere…but they’re just so minor and take so long. The movie’s pacing is very weird. Like, one minute the main character is freaked out by demons, and the next minute she’s studying, or chilling with her friend. And the camera thing? That’s just too stupid for me to ignore. There’s no reason for this guy to be as intensely filming what’s going on as he is. He’s just an asshole that won’t stop being an asshole even after it becomes clear that he’s fucking things up. So yeah, it’s acceptable for what it is…but it’s not that much fun to watch. - Inviso
Basically this couple is being haunted by evil spirits, and instead of calling the ghostbusters like anyone with half a brain they set up a camera and make a documentary. With this setup they witness such unspeakable eldrich horrors such as the doors of their house opening and closing without permission.
Here is a summery of the entire movie: There is some shots of them sleeping. Something goes bump in the night. The girl screams and cries. The dude tries to search for the spook, usually not even bothering to turn the lights on because it is fun to stumble around in the dark holding a big fucking camera. They find nothing. Repeat ad nausem for the duration of the film.
Through all this we learn nothing about what the being was, why it was out to get the girl, or anything really. There is no more depth to this than watching these people's shitty home movies while some invisible monster tries to scare them in an unimpressive manner. - Karo
This was so boring. Holy shit the only reason I didn’t fall asleep is because I was doing other stuff also. - prof
This movie is a sham since there is nothing paranormal and no activity. - JONA
This is like watching Wal-Mart security cam footage for an hour and a half. It was boring. It was tedious. It was uninspired. WAIT LOOK OUT FOR THAT BLANKET! The atmosphere and horror was about as thrilling as that use of capitalization. I wish movies had faces so I could punch the one belong to this fetid turd. - Scarlet
Paranormal Activity is akin to watching paint dry but every 10 minutes someone let's off an airhorn in your ear. It's ultimately a dual experience of tedium: boredom and annoyance, complete with a cardboard cut-out of a couple and a typically thin reason to keep filming after the first scare and not just get the hell out of dodge. An overhyped piece of garbage shoveled to theater goers that are typically fans of loud noises going off in their ears. - Snake
39. Wrong Turn (2003) 201 points
Inviso: 23
Scarlet: 32
Prof: 34
Karo: 37
Snake: 37
JONA: 38
I feel like there’s a lot of movies on this list revolving around young people getting stranded in the backwoods and stalked by mutants. That’s not to say Wrong Turn is bad. It’s pretty standard fare. It does everything I expect from a horror movie: assemble a small group of people and watch them get picked off in gruesome ways, one by one, until the final few characters manage to fight back and fight their way to safety. Does it do anything ground-breaking? No, it doesn’t. But it also doesn’t actively offend me or bore more, so that’s something, right? - Inviso
Wrong Turn is a very unoriginal and not particularly enjoyable horror movie. It reminds me a lot of The Hills Have Eyes, except that it takes place in a forest. The only time it got even a little bit thrilling was when its annoying characters were getting killed off -- and that's not intentional on the filmmaker's part. Much like Eliza Dushku, I wish I could wipe my mind after every engagement so I could forget this trash.
Rating: 19/100 - Scarlet
Okay so the opening scene and the credits was a pretty strong start. And then it completely failed to live up to it. Oh well. Nothing after the credits was something I enjoyed watching or scared me. - prof
So there's these hillbillies in west virginia who apparently fucked their parents and siblings a few too many times and it turned them into orcs. A bunch of travelers take an ill advised shortcut through the woods there and end up chopped to pieces.
What we get is simply the most lame, generic, white-bread slasher film imaginable with forgettable characters, forgettable killers, and a forgettable setting.
The biggest wrong turn of all was the studio greenlighting this movie. - Karo
Generic backwoods horror that somehow has spawned five sequels, albeit all direct-to-video, which speaks a lot to the quality of this film actually. It's a direct-to-video gore slog dolled up as a theater release to give it some pretense of actual quality. Three Finger is not going to be a horror icon. Stop trying. - Snake
Joey Quinn from Dexter does stuff and I don't remember anything about this movie. - JONA
38. Open Water (2003) 191 points
Snake: 26
JONA: 27
Karo: 27
Inviso: 33
Scarlet: 38
Prof: 40
Open Water is at best a visceral experience, an all-too-real look into being stranded in the middle of the ocean surrounded by one of nature's most deadly and misunderstood killing machines, with the cinematography of the film selling that perfectly. But at worst, it's a meandering snooze fest that doesn't really make for an entertaining film, with some idiotic character decisions driving the plot forward. Some more realistic characters (and better actors) would've made a huge difference in selling the idea the filmmakers were going for. It's not the 21st century Jaws it so desperately wants to be, but it makes some enjoyable strides here and there. - Snake
Not exactly the most riveting movie, but the characters aren't unlikable and act how I think people in that situation would be like. - JONA
A feature length adaption of the boring vacation videos of a couple vacationing in the bahamas or whatever.
The first 20 minutes of the movie is just the mundane aspects of a scuba diving trip and the rest is the couple floating in the water aimlessly while having marital problems or exclaiming how much the situation sucks.
There were sharks teased at repeatedly, but they do absolutely nothing until the very end.
The cinematography is atrocious and amateurish, and half the scenes look like they were taken by someone's fucking cellphone.
It's like some bad student film that got accidentally released in theaters. - Karo
This one isn’t as bad as some of the movies I ranked above it, but the thing is I’d much rather watch a BAD (yet interesting) horror movie, than an okay (yet boring) thriller. This is definitely a low-budget film and that’s abundantly clear from the video quality looking like something out of a mid-nineties porno. The premise is interesting enough, don’t get me wrong. There’s something extremely unsettling about the idea that someone could just get left behind in the middle of the ocean, and never be seen or heard from again. But I dunno, when you only have two actors, there’s only so much you can do. Like, even a single-actor film (like 127 Hours) at least allows that one actor to showcase their abilities. Putting two actors together doesn’t give them enough material to work with and play off, yet they’re expected to do so. Even at eighty minutes, this just feels too damn long and slow. Sorry. - Inviso
A couple floats in the open ocean crying for an hour, then one of them floats by themselves, crying, for a little while. The End.
Rating: 6/100 - Scarlet
Fuck right the fuck off with this bullshit. I refuse to believe an actual boat with actual diving people would do that. Why is this so dumb. At least something like Final Destination gives the excuse of it being an avatar of death…. And learning it is based on a true story really doesn’t help. Fuck off until you stop being idiotic humanity. - prof
37. Cabin Fever (2002) 187 points
Prof: 5
Scarlet: 33
JONA: 36
Karo: 36
Inviso: 38
Snake: 39
God this was painful to watch. It was just so intense and disgusting. Such a wonderful job of being a horror movie. The play on turning something that could have been sexy into disgusting horror that happened when Marcy shaved herself was truly a wonderfully evil idea. - prof
Pancakes scene is good for a laugh because it's quite possibly the most random thing I've ever seen in a movie. The rest is utter shit.
Rating: 18/100 - Scarlet
Fuck Party Cop. - JONA
A 'comedy' about flesh eating bacteria. Ok, that sounds wonderful already.
So these teenagers go camping in the woods, all of whom are obnoxious dipshit douchebags.
Soon everyone starts engaging in healthy activities such as playing around with firearms while drunk, and having sex when some of them are possibly infected with a disease of unknown origin. I am less worried about the spread of the disease and more worried about the spread of the DNA from these people among the greater human race.
Basically they all start getting skin rashes, and everyone shows themselves to be the most horrible and selfish individuals ever as they attempt to survive. The movie thankfully finishes with the happy ending of every single character dead, dying, or soon to be infected.
You ever wonder what drives all those slasher lunatics into going around chasing after teens in the woods with chainsaws? It is watching the fuckers in this movie. - Karo
The acting in this movie is terrible. On all fronts. Fifteen minutes in and I literally hated every single person in the cast and couldn’t wait for the majority of them to die. Honestly, this movie is like a parody movie that isn’t self-aware enough (see: Scream, Cabin in the Woods) to realize it’s a parody (despite the fact that it more than likely was intended to be a parody.) They just took a stupid premise way too seriously, yet at the same time had these bizarre tonal shifts that served no purpose whatsoever. The gore is disgusting to the point of irritation, and everything about the movie is just extremely stupid and pointless. I hated it in its entirety. - Inviso
Cabin Fever is a mess of a film, an unfunny, horribly acted piece that lacks any true identity as it tries to pay homage to too many different horror films that it becomes diluted. Cabin Fever relies on shock value and idiotic decisions, and a film where you're supposed to hate all the characters means there's really nothing to be scared of or latch on to. And then of course there's Pancakes, the most out of nowhere scene in a film ever which ends up having plot relevance for crying out loud. It's not funny, worse, it's not scary, and you're just left with a film that's everything and nothing at once. - Snake
36. Hostel (2005) 185 points
Prof: 14
JONA: 29
Snake: 31
Karo: 35
Inviso: 37
Scarlet: 39
This wasn’t nearly as good as Cabin Fever. I was not a fan of the relatively happy ending and it just failed to be as scary or disgusting as Cabin Fever was. Still it was a fairly entertaining exploration of humanity being fucked where rich people pay to get control of someone else. It is till well done but a weaker result than Cabin Fever. - prof
Unlikable characters get tortured by unlikable people who get killed off. Not the worst thing, I guess. - JONA
Another Eli Roth film, another character lacking gorefest. Hostel isn't without its merits though. There's actually some decent social commentary hidden behind its blood and guts, where pay-for-pleasure affects its protagonists in both positive and negative ways, experiencing both sides of the same coin. Unfortunately, it's hidden behind boring and depraved torture, the kind of sickness a director like Roth prefers to focus on instead of the vastly more interesting subtext. Its message gets muddled along the way, especially in its ending. - Snake
These dumbass college dudes check into an inn where all the girls run around half dressed and want to have sex with everyone, and of course they don't find this suspicious in the slightest.
After they spend some time fucking chicks, painting faces on their assholes, and making some of the worst pickup lines ever, they all thankfully end up drugged and brutally tortured to death.
Everything unfolds in an astoundingly predictable manner. The hostel is actually a front for sadistic psychopaths. The weird guy they met on the train is evil. Yawn. - Karo
Torture porn for torture porn’s sake, I’m pretty sure I think Eli Roth is a shitty director. The creepy tone is fine. There’s a certain ominous feel to the whole movie, and the parts pre-torture porn were pretty satisfying in setting an unsettling atmosphere. But then…it’s just disgusting for the sake of being disgusting. The various ways the characters are tortured? Ew. You can’t help but feel bad for so many of them, because aside from Icelandic asshole (and the sole survivor), you have a group of mostly good people who just got fucked over. I appreciate the survivor getting revenge and being a good guy, going back to save the Japanese girl…but it’s just too much for me to ever find amusing. The fact that it’s not a terrible movie outside of the torture is what ranks it above some absolute dog shit movies. - Inviso
A repellent, odious, foul, revolting, distasteful, objectionable, sickening, repugnant and awful film with no redeeming quality except for tons of gore. Unforgivably scornful and shameful. The horrendous writing is laughably bad and the acting is just as ghastly. The most gross and nasty film I've ever seen.
Rating: 5/100 - Scarlet
35. Friday the 13th (2009) 180 points
Inviso: 16
Prof: 21
JONA: 31
Scarlet: 36
Snake: 36
Karo: 40
As far as slasher films go, the Friday the 13th remake (reboot? Soft reboot?) didn’t do anything spectacular. It had sex and gratuitous nudity, unique enough kills, one-note comic relief that ends up dying before anyone of actual importance. It’s standard. But you know what? I like standard. There’ve been a lot of slasher films on this list that tried to be deep or didn’t strike a proper balance in terms of having a large enough cast to kill off. This one didn’t try to explain Jason’s back story. It just gave us a cast of characters that served their roles as disposable cannon fodder, and I liked that. Also, holy SHIT Bree was fucking hot. More sex scenes starring her please. - Inviso
There were many wonderful tits in this movie so that was nice. And it was a mindless entertaining slasher film. I kinda hate the way it ended though tbh. Like why not show them both actually die there or just imply that he was going to be reborn. Still it was entertaining enough that I enjoyed watching it. - prof
Whenever Chewie wasn't on screen, I was asking "Where's Chewie?" - JONA
Is Friday the 13th a great movie? No. But is it an entertaining movie? No. But is it nostalgic for fans of the original? No. No, no, no, no, no. Bunch of kids, who talk to themselves excessively beyond all reason, do things their parents wouldn't want them to and get systematically murdered by a super human psycho. This is a terrible movie in every sense of the word.
Rating: 9/100 - Scarlet
Look, Friday the 13th's reboot won't do anything new to tarnish the reputation Jason Voorhees has nowadays. The man's been to space after all. There's nowhere to go after that, that's rock bottom. I would say this is actually the best Jason has been in years if everything else in the film wasn't complete crap. It's a pointless effort that lacks any true craft for tension, atmosphere, or horror, with kills that don't come close to matching the amazing creativity of the classic series. It's dull in every sense of the word. - Snake
A remake of the classic slasher series. It is produced by Michael Bay because destroying 80's franchises gives him orgasmic glee.
Basically these young people go on vacation in some cabin too near to Jason's camp and he doesn’t like it. These dipshits are like the most obnoxious individuals ever, we got a stuck-up rich prick, a frat boy asshole, an oversensitive black guy, and a bunch of sluts. Any one of these would be enough to ruin any movie that they are in, but we get ALL of them here.
To make things even worse, everyone is the most laughably unconvincing actors possible. It doesn’t take a great thespian to scream bloody murder while getting hacked to pieces with a machete, but they cant even fucking do that right.
The whole movie is just everyone being randomly murdered or making the most atrocious, cringe-worthy 'jokes' imaginable: “hey, they don't call me the wood wizard because I masturbate a lot!” HA HA HA HA! That is so hilarious and real people totally talk like that! Totally!
There's this thing where this dude is looking for his missing sister, who he manages to find alive because she conveniently looks like Jason's mommy.
There's shit, and then there's the bacteria that feeds on said shit. Then there’s the shit that comes out the ass of the shit-eating bacteria. That’s the kind of shit this is. - Karo
34. Final Destination (2000) 175 points
Inviso: 20
JONA: 24
Prof: 29
Scarlet: 29
Snake: 35
Karo: 38
I’m not gonna say this movie is amazing, because it does have some nagging flaws. That, and Final Destination 2 is easily the better film. But by sheer virtue of having such a unique and well-executed concept, I have to give FD1 a ton of credit. The Rube Goldberg death scenes are worth watch what is admittedly a basic late 90s/early 00s slasher film, and I also appreciate that the typical ending jump scare follows a cleverer pattern than other films as well. Overall, it’s a solid movie. Just not the best in the franchise. - Inviso
Forgettable people get killed in this forgettable movie that's part of a forgettable franchise. - JONA
The inevitability of death. So like the insane ways people died was actually pretty entertaining but I dunno death inevitably killing people was kinda not something I am that into. The villain was a bit too non-existent and existential. It felt kinda pointless since the characters didn’t have anyone to actually fight against. Still the deaths were entertaining enough that I at least found it kinda entertaining. - Prof
The premise of this movie makes no sense whatsoever. If 'Death has a plan for everyone', Death is kind of acting like some incompetent intern trying to fix his mistakes. Despite a panel of X-Files' alums at the helm and a promising premise, flighty performances and poor execution keep Final Destination from ever taking off.
Rating: 20/100 - Scarlet
As a concept, Final Destination definitely has potential. But that's all it really has. While the death scenes are entertaining, the stuff in between is just dry filler, characters are flat, story is not really enthralling in any way. It's just an excuse to kill some people. - Snake
A bunch of preppy douchebag teenagers get off a plane minutes before it explodes, and this angers a god of death because it was supposed to have been their time to die or something.
So this entity tries to bring balance to the force by having the kids die in the most ridiculous and convoluted ways imaginable, which gives them the chance to escape their fate yet again multiple times. This is the reason why any god of death who isn’t a fucking idiot just kills people with a magic notebook that gives people heart attacks.
Between scenes of people being impaled through the throat by an exploding computer monitor or whatever, everyone does mundane activities to this cheesy 'dunnn-dunnnn' music as if to say 'this is meant to be suspenseful, so you better fucking be on the edge of your seat!' Yeah, no. Try making a movie that is actually scary, or at least one not written by a r*****ed 12 year old.
Why does the protagonist suddenly get psychic powers? Why does saving people's lives make the spirit stop targeting them? Why does it stop hunting them for six months while the main kid recovers? Why did they make so many fucking sequels?
No items, shlock only, final destination. - Karo
33. Wolf Creek (2005) 173 points
Snake: 17
Karo: 29
JONA: 30
Prof: 30
Scarlet: 31
Inviso: 36
Wolf Creek is a great slow-burn film, letting the audience in on its characters and a close-up of Mick Taylor in the first half before plunging them into a world of pain in the second half. Mick Taylor is one of the scariest villains of 21st century film, a sadist serial killer who doesn't kill for any grand message, but just out of his own sick pleasure. The atmosphere and setting are top notch, with the Australian Outback providing the kind of real-life setting that's naturally cold, unwelcoming and hostile. The handheld film style gives the film a gritty look that accents the horror even more. - Snake
Basically these people take a roadtrip across the australian outback, and when their car breaks down they put their trust in this dubious guy who is randomly driving around abandoned highways at midnight. We got some Darwin award winners right here.
Anyway they end up kidnapped and somehow manage to escape and overcome their captor. They don't bother to tie him up or finish him off because they are fucking idiots and so he comes after them.
There's a particularly stupid scene where they are worried about their pursuer seeing their headlights, and instead of simply turning them off these dumb bitches decide to go for the extremely intelligent step of pushing the whole fucking car off a cliff. Because of this they have to go back to the killer's camp to get another car and everyone ends up dead. Way to go, guys. - Karo
Forgettable women get tortured in this unpleasant but forgettable movie. - JONA
It did a fairly decent job of being intense when the girls were trying to get away. The title cards to try and make it seem like a true story were dumb as fuck though and annoyed me. It would have been much better if it was like people they were partying with discussing people going missing or something for the opening in terms of building suspense. The text explanations of that were lame as fuck. - Prof
If for some reason you have to watch this, go ahead and skip the first 45 minutes, because nothing fucking happens until after that. I'm not exaggerating either. NOTHING.
Rating: 20/100 - Scarlet
This is another movie where I can definitely appreciate its merits to an extent, but ultimately, I’m not a huge fan of it. It’s a mix between too slow (it takes literally half the film to get to any of the actual horror) and too deep into the torture-porn genre. There are only three characters we get to watch get tortured, and that’s not a big enough cast to really appreciate the film as a slasher pic. I also don’t like how we have that boring first half, then the one girl escapes and manages to take the bad guy down pretty quickly, then she escapes with her friend and they both get picked off because the guy wasn’t really dead. It’s either poor pacing or poor plotting, but the movie ends with the dude that was out-of-commission for a while just randomly escaping and going back to his normal life. That’s not a satisfying conclusion in any way, and I don’t care if it’s “based on true events.” - Inviso
32. Jeepers Creepers (2002) 172 points
JONA: 20
Inviso: 22
Snake: 30
Karo: 32
Prof: 33
Scarlet: 35
Man, do I have to do writeups for every movie? Uh, it's not the worst. - JONA
This movie feels very much like a classic horror movie from the seventies/eighties. You’d got the demonic monster that goes on a killing spree, you’ve got the clichés like a broken-down car and lack of phone, and you’ve got a young brother and sister just making stupid decisions that ultimately get the Mac dude killed. It’s unnerving for sure, and none of it makes any real sense…but I think that the nonsense loops back around to being amusing most of the time. It’s not deep or anything, but it’s still pretty decent as far as scary movies go. - Inviso
I have to wonder sometimes what they were thinking with the Creeper's design. It's like the Gill-man decided it was time to cosplay as the Saint of Killers. It's one of the goofiest things I've ever seen. Jeepers Creepers does not have a lot of craft to its filmmaking, it is a pretty straight-forward horror film, what you see is what you get as they run down a whole laundry list of horror tropes. It's not really bad even, just not very imaginative. - Snake
A couple of teens on a roadtrip run afoul of some nutjob in a truck who is angry that he couldn’t land a part in one of the Mad Max movies.
So they are in the middle of nowhere, night is falling, and they have no phone, yet they decide to go trespassing on the property of a serial killer. Oh hey, no chance that could go wrong in any way.
The rest of the movie is just spent with him chasing after the two kids in a very generic fashion. Some psychic lady just shows up randomly because they needed a black character in the movie.
We pretty much run the gamut of everything that is generally wrong with the horror genre in this film, cheap jumpscares, arbitrary plot, shallow characters, the works. - Karo
It started off pretty strong with the entire evil truck. Once the Creeper left the truck he became less scary by a lot though and it felt kinda whatever so it stopped being entertaining. - Prof
Moves along at a fucking snail's pace through the first half, with virtually no entertainment, only to finally reveal a goofy-ass, pathetic-looking "monster", and to end it with the standard, mediocre chase scenes. If you're making a horror flick, at least make it scary or entertaining, if you can't do both. This movie is neither, and doesn't even have the common decency to try, really. Shit.
Rating: 13/100 - Scarlet
31. Dead Snow (2009) 156 points
Snake: 18
Prof: 20
Scarlet: 24
Inviso: 25
Karo: 34
JONA: 35
Sure, it's zombies, we've all seen them before. Even Nazi Zombies has been done before. But Dead Snow is a blast of a film, a pure gleeful balls-to-the-wall violence extravaganza with plenty of comedic value to keep you glued to the screen. One thing I find interesting is that the zombies are actually working towards a goal themselves (besides brains) as they try to guard their treasure. It's unique enough to be a standout of the much tired zombie genre. - Snake
A trashy but entertaining zombie murderfest. That is really all there is to it. It managed to be entertaining despite not being anything special. - Prof
A complete waste of the premise. No laughs, no expansion on the Nazi thing besides the uniforms, no innovative zombie killing - just chainsaws and a whole bunch of intestine pulling. I used to say Nazis were the best villains in cinema. This has me reconsidering that proposition.
Rating: 27/100 - Scarlet
This movie started out super cheesy, but not in a fun way. It was a complete anthology of horror movie clichés. But then, somewhere around the second half, the movie hits that mark where it becomes SO cheesy that it’s hilarious. It becomes self-aware almost, and it has a marked improvement. Everything about the movie is over-the-top, from a chick banging a dude immediately after he took a shit, to a completely unexplained moment of a nerdy guy trying to smother his girlfriend, to the AWESOME moment of a snowmobile-mounted gatling gun taking out a battalion of zambamboes. It was fun enough. Wish I could’ve found a decent audio though (Norwegian with English subtitles ffs). - Inviso
A bunch of drunken college students go on vacation in a cabin in the mountains (where else) and encounter the one thing worse than zombies, nazi zombies.
They attack the kids, people die, yadda yadda. You’ve seen all this shit before.
As the movie goes on, an already moronic concept spirals into an ever more catastrophic tailspin of stupidity, with silly intestinal hijinks and characters behaving in a manner that defies all believability.
Horror plus comedy is hard to do right, and this is an example of how to do it very very wrong. - Karo
This movie has Nazi zombies! That's the list of good things in the movie! - JONA
30. Freddy vs. Jason (2003) 153 points (103 tiebreaker)
JONA: 22
Snake: 24
Karo: 25
Prof: 27
Scarlet: 27
Inviso: 28
Damn gurl! This movie be whack as hell but the fighting be baller as fuck. - JONA
This is a pretty fun movie between two of my favorite horror villains, and there's a lot of potential in a sort of expanded universe based on these kind of encounters. I like Jason as this sort of pawn to Freddy the mastermind, and it's interesting the think the seeds of this film were sowed way back in Jason Goes to Hell. But beyond the fun showdown between the two genre stalwarts, the rest of the film is kind of a stale retread of slasher films and kind of slow. - Snake
Movies based entirely around the concept of 'whoa dude, wouldn't it be awesome if (blank) fought (blank)?' are never good and this is no exception.
Basically they need a convoluted reason why these two horror icons would even be in the same city let alone fighting against each other, so Freddy manipulates Jason's dreams so that he goes to elm street and kills random people so everyone will believe in Freddy again. Yeah, that makes sense.
Anyway Jason eventually goes and does his own thing and Freddy doesn’t like it so they fight, both in the nightmare realm and the real world. (is that even a thing Freddy is supposed to be able to do?)
A big issue is that Jason has like zero presence or charisma compared to his dreamland-dwelling opponent and every scene with them (and in fact the whole movie), feels like Freddy's. A better title would have been 'Nightmare on Elm Street Featuring Jason Stabbing a Few People'
Yes Jason does 'win', but it really feels like he shouldn't have, given he spends the entire movie being a tool of various characters. - Karo
Cool enough of an idea but it was never actually scary. Still at least it tried and was entertaining as more of an action film. Ended up being somewhat entertaining. - Prof
Two atrociously trashy, overcommercialized and endlessly repetitive horror franchises converge into one super duper crapfest. Slavishly obedient to the series' preprogrammed storyline conventions, the film successively kills off a flock of obnoxious teen-like things led by a theatrically incompetent but enormous-breasted blonde. Their two dusty but still cartoonish executioners are then pitted against each other, setting the unfortunate precedent for the year after's Alien vs. Predator.
Rating: 22/100 - Scarlet
I will fully acknowledge that this isn’t a good movie in ANY way. It’s cheesy, the acting is terrible, the plot is stupid, and really, it’s completely cookie cutter. Like, this is a pretty standard Friday the 13th movie. I specify Friday the 13th because well, when you get down to it, Freddy kills exactly one person in the movie and the rest is just Jason doing the same thing he does in every Friday the 13th movie. That being said, sometimes with a horror movie, you just want something mindless and stupid and fun, and this movie does enough good to warrant an “okay” placement compared to the trash below it. The actual Freddy/Jason fights are cool, and there are some cool death scenes, plus the girl shit-talking Freddy was great. So yeah, that’s all I have to say about this one. It’s a solid B-movie, but it’s a B-movie nonetheless. - Inviso
29. Halloween (2007) 153 points (102 tiebreaker)
Karo: 18
Prof: 22
Scarlet: 25
Inviso: 27
Snake: 28
JONA: 33
The story of a little boy who grows up to be a masked serial killer because of poor parenting decisions. It is interesting in the way that goes into the background of Michael Myers in a way that most slasher killers don’t receive. However, once we get about halfway through it just reverts to same old, same old, and the rest of the movie is just Michael murdering a whole bunch of people (most of whom deserved it greatly). - Karo
Mindless entertaining slasher film was mindless entertainment. So yeah it was enjoyable enough for that. Beginning was a bit slow but it still kept me entertained for the most part. - Prof
At the onset of the film, attempting to explain the origin of Michael Myers is a cardinal sin, removing any sort of mystery the character once had and making him less menacing. Instead we are treated to a wretched montage with Nazareth's "Love Hurts", an excess of cameos, and brutal violence. As a result, the film is neither scary nor fun to watch. Simply, a complete and utter waste of time. Watch the original instead if you need to glut yourself with gratuitous slasher violence.
Rating: 25/100 - Scarlet
This one isn’t so bad. I’ve actually never seen any of the original Halloween franchise, so I don’t know any of the backstory here. BUT, I appreciate seeing Michael’s past and how he’s always been a demented little serial killer, even going so far as to run roughshod on the insane asylum in which he was being kept. Admittedly though, dividing the movie between Michael’s past and the more modern day didn’t quite work that well, because we spent a lot of time dealing with the present day in such a way that it felt rushed. Like, Michael kills a fuckton of people to get to Laurie, but it’s all rushed in the back half of the movie because they do such a strong job building him up as a child. It’s okay in the end, but it feels like it wasn’t sure what kind of story it truly wanted. - Inviso
The original Halloween was a horror masterpiece, a carefully crafted piece that reveled in creating atmospheric tension first and slow-building up to its kills, with creative camera angles punctuating the action backed by a memorable score. Rob Zombie's Halloween isn't nearly as delicate here, and though I'm generally a fan of his works, I don't think his style of film-making is suitable to a character like Michael Myers, who isn't so much a brain-dead serial killer as he is someone with a goal. The backstory provided for Myers here is really messy and is way too obvious as it drills into your head that yes, something is really wrong with Myers. There's not a lot of subtlety to it, but most of all, it's just not necessary. Carpenter showed us the pure evil of Myers without drilling into our heads that he had a messed up childhood. Ultimately, it's a case of excess versus restraint. There's credit to Zombie here for directing his original take on the source material rather than doing a shot-for-shot remake, but a rushed second-half and lack of any true mystery make this Halloween a forgettable one. - Snake
How fucking fitting that it was fucking directed by that fucking prick Rob Zombie because it was fucking brought back from the dead and it fucking robbed me of 2 fucking hours of my fucking life. Motherfucker. - JONA
28. Scary Movie (2000) 152 points
Scarlet: 12
Prof: 13
Karo: 26
Inviso: 29
JONA: 34
Snake: 38
Scary Movie might have more misfires than hits, but because it throws the kitchen, the kitchen sink, the food in the pantry, the utensils, the placemats, and the rest of the house at you in terms of jokes, there are bound to be some jokes you find funny. It's not as smart as Scream or as scary as pretty much any slasher out there, but it's dumb and funny and if it sounds like it appeals to you, it probably will. That's all there is to say.
Rating: 53/100 - Scarlet
This was so absolutely ridiculous and I love it for that. Like everything about it is just absolutely hilarious starting with that ridiculous run through the sprinklers and then what kills her. But then there is the villain getting high while the guy’s orgasm literally launches a girl into the roof and it is just so fucking hilarious. - Prof
Also known as the only member of the '(blank) Movie' series that was funny in even the slightest.
Basically a whole bunch of horror movie tropes are sent up by people who don't understand the meaning of the words 'subtlety' or 'restraint'. Its just all the writers putting down a bunch of random shit while smoking crack, and about 10% of it is actually good for any laughs.
It is early 2000s wacky referencal humor at its most juvenile, and helped spawn a franchise that contains many of the worst movies ever made. - Karo
This one…doesn’t really hold up that well on a rewatch. It still has its moments, sure, but I think maybe the cavalcade of parody films in recent years has tainted my appreciation of this one. There are some great instances making fun of dumb team slasher films of the nineties, sure, and I won’t deny that pretty much any scene with Shorty in it is amazing…but ultimately, too much of the film feels forced. There’s too many shock value scenes, or jokes that get run into the ground at blazing speeds. It just doesn’t work for me anymore. - Inviso
These movies were never good. - JONA
The dated film references don't help this film; I mean Ghostface doing the matrix is so cringey. These parody films just are not my thing; there's not really any creativity to them, they just put in stuff that's popular and they may seem like jokes, but at the heart of it they're just doing what other films have already done and passing it off as lampooning. Horror doesn't really need stuff like Scary Movie to take it down a notch. Some of the best satires of horror come from films that are actually still serious films; see You're Next or Cabin in the Woods or even Shaun of the Dead. We don't need to be clobbered in the head with other movies. - Snake
27. The Collector (2009) 149 points (108 tiebreaker)
Snake: 7
Inviso: 17
Prof: 28
Karo: 31
JONA: 32
Scarlet: 34
Some people unfairly misjudge The Collector as just another torture-porn film, but when you delve deeper into the film, this game of cat-vs.-cat. is as thrilling as it can get. The Collector himself may be a sadistic killer, but torture-porn films love to focus on the blood & gore of its victims; The Collector prefers to let that stuff happen in the background, often cutting away before the gruesome stuff happens as we only the see the aftermath later on. What really drives The Collector home for me is this idea of two criminals going head-to-head without The Collector knowing Arkin's there for a majority of the film. These are two characters used to being in power positions who undermine each other at every moment. In any other film, Arkin could be an antagonist, but not here. The character development for Arkin before the action gets underway is much appreciated, getting us into his mindset and motivation and character traits, particularly a love for children that comes into play later. There are some good shots I like in this film, like when the camera pans overhead showing both Arkin and The Collector entering and leaving opposite doors, respectively; or when a light flashes revealing the various razor wires spreading over the room. I really like The Collector himself as well; he's very otherworldly, never speaking and moving in strange ways. This is really well-crafted horror and a welcome addition to the genre. - Snake
I’ve watched every Saw movie, and while Saw itself is not complete torture porn…you can definitely tell that it started the genre. And most films in the torture porn genre are dogshit because they’re more interested in grossing the viewer out than in being a good movie. In that sense, The Collector feels like it has torture porn ELEMENTS, but is overall trying to be a decent movie. I feel it succeeds in that regard. You establish the protagonist as a normal guy trying to make ends meet, who ends up in a shit situation of his own accord. Watching him try to outplay a guy who planned for everything (except a career criminal with an eye for traps) is pretty awesome, as is the entire reverse Home Alone aspect of the movie. That fucking kid though. He was SO close to getting out, but FUCKING Hannah, man. - Inviso
It had some really intense moments but a lot of it just felt pointless and not entertaining. - Prof
A professional thief chooses the worst time ever to rob a house, right when it is under attack from a serial killer.
This psycho apparently 'collects' people, and kills the ones he doesn’t like. He lines the house with ridiculous booby traps because this is clearly the best way to kill people in a discriminate manner. He also seems to always stuff one of his previous victims in a box to use for 'bait'. Bait for what? What does that even fucking mean?
Every aspect of the movie is bathed in pure idiocy, the aforementioned traps are on the Wile E Coyote tier of realism and the fact the Collector set them all up after capturing the only occupants of the house that posed him any threat makes his motives even more incomprehensible.
The characters are written in a way that is beyond amateurish and their actions are inconsistent and lack any sort of believability. This burglar apparently has the most unusual moral compass of anyone in the professional crime industry, as on more than four separate occasions he risks his life attempting to help the people he was trying to rob despite being badly wounded and on a tight time schedule. He was also possibly afraid of and/or hallucinating insects, though this was never explained and soon was completely forgotten. The Collector himself seemed to have some interesting psychosises, but he gets zero development beyond a few lines shouted by a man in a box. - Karo
The collector, himself, is quite incompetent and the torture is boring. - JONA
There isn't an ounce of intelligence behind this film. I can't wait for this torture-porn fad to be over forever. Just awful stuff. 17/100 - Scarlet
26. House of 1000 Corpses (2003) 149 points (100 tiebreaker)
Prof: 9
Scarlet: 19
Karo: 22
Snake: 22
JONA: 37
Inviso: 40
So… that song for the credits was 10/10. Plus Baby was really hot. The music in general was fucking amazing. I also loved the entire old video camera style recording for parts of it. Really helped with the atmosphere. I also liked the evil people just completely winning. - Prof
House of 1000 Corpses serves as the perfect table setter for Rob Zombie's uneven filmmaking career - a cliche first act transforms into a uniquely and horrifyingly bizarre second act, concluding with a third act that makes absolutely no sense and discredits everything that happened prior for the sake of a few louder scares.
Rating: 35/100 - Scarlet
Basically these kids on a roadtrip end up staying at a house that is the home of this ridiculous addams family of serial killers. Every character acts unnatural and bizarre, and every once and a while everything goes into florescent negative colors for no reason while weird guitar riffs play.
I'm not sure if this is meant to be a parody, an art film, or if there was just way too much fucking weed involved.
The crazy blond chick was hot in a sort of Harley Quinn kind of way so I guess there's that. - Karo
While I'm more of a fan of the stylized and focused sequel The Devil's Rejects, House of 1000 Corpses definitely has a few plusses, with some of the most entertaining villains in the horror medium and some great outlandish visuals that Zombie is best known for. Love the whole intro to the film with Spaulding's Museum of Monsters and Madmen, and in many ways the entire thing feels like a fun throwback to the exploitation horror films of the 70s like a personal favorite, Last House on the Left. That's all it is though, a throwback. It lacks the real grit and uniqueness those films had. The film never feels like it goes anywhere, spinning us through an endless parade of twisted carnival theatrics. It's fun for awhile, but eventually the grossness and charm starts to wear off. - Snake
Everything about this movie is annoying. The main characters, the villains, the dialogue and the way it's shot give me headaches. - JONA
I’m not someone who’s automatically gonna wuss out at gore and stuff, but this movie just took shit too damn far. This movie was definitely an homage to some of the older “sick and twisted shit happens in the backwoods” genre of horror movies, but it’s completely unappealing to me. The developed male characters get offed unceremoniously and then a trio of cops are added to the mix just to up the body count (seriously, there’s no reason for their inclusion given how utterly irrelevant they are.) The two female protagonists got no real characterization despite one of them “surviving” the movie. It’s just a bunch of sadistic torture without the plot or storyline to make me accept said torture. For fuck’s sake, the movie’s climax comes completely out of nowhere with random monsters suddenly appearing, and it furthers the idea that this movie is mindless garbage. - Inviso
25. The Strangers (2008) 149 points (99 tiebreaker)
Snake: 11
JONA: 14
Prof: 18
Inviso: 30
Scarlet: 37
Karo: 39
The Strangers is the perfect example on how to do a home invasion film right. Backed by a terrific score, director Bryan Bertino proves himself a master of tension. This film is so effective because it focuses on a very personal subject, which is your own home. A sacred place where you're supposed to feel safe, but The Strangers subverts that at every turn without having its victims appear too hokey or unrealistic. It's a simplistic film, but that's not a knock against it; it's quick to scare and get its point across and sometimes that is all you really need. I will admit though the very end is kind of dumb and weird. - Snake
Good atmosphere but the characters are idiots and the plot is thin. - JONA
This was intense as fuck. It was very well done as scary story of two people under siege. - Prof
Like a lot of films on this list…The Strangers has some definite pacing issues that made it very difficult for me to enjoy the movie as a whole. Like, first fifteen minutes are fine. You’re setting the tone with the characters. But then you leap IMMEDIATELY into the most hardcore shit possible. Like, the movie goes from zero to sixty REALLY early on, and it’s very hard to maintain that level of intensity, even though the movie itself is only eighty minutes. There’s only so many different ways you can psychologically torment two people before it starts to get boring, as evidenced by the last twenty minutes before the ending basically being about Liv Tyler hobbling around the same setting we’ve already seen her in a bunch before. - Inviso
I have never laughed so hard during a movie. Really, they outdid themselves. Pure genius. Can't wait for the sequel. The best part was definitely the sequence on the road, when the three murderers met some young Christians and asked for a pamphlet because they sin "sometimes." The symbolism was so rich, I felt it explode on my face.
Rating: 9/100 - Scarlet
Supposedly based on real events that nobody actually witnessed, though I'm pretty sure the couple in question was not actually attacked by the disciples of the happy mask salesman in the way that is shown here.
Anyway most of the movie is just this chick stumbling around in poorly lit areas while every so often there is a 'scary' bump or a bang caused by these people who seem to have no purpose or motive other than to destroy all means of outside communication and then frighten her a lot.
They eventually tie the couple up and randomly stab them to death and we never find out who the strangers are or why they did what they did. Killing these people was apparently important enough to the masked trio that they would risk their lives taking on someone who had a shotgun, but not important enough to keep them from committing the murders in a very convoluted and roundabout way that could have gone wrong at any turn.
What a fucking stupid movie. - Karo
24. Alien vs. Predator (2004) 148 points
Inviso: 19
JONA: 21
Karo: 24
Prof: 26
Scarlet: 26
Snake: 32
It’s not quite as good as Underworld was as a versus horror movie, but it’s leagues better than Freddy vs. Jason in terms of being semi-quality. None of the cast is abysmal, and while I don’t really give a shit about ANY of them due to an oversaturation of cannon fodder, I’m willing to tolerate a little excess to provide the two big bads something to kill. The general concept is interesting enough with regards to getting Aliens and Predators to Earth to duke it out. The few fights we get between Alien (the really resilient one with the net scarring) and Predator (all of them) are pretty cool, and I love the direction the story goes at the end, with the humans teaming up with the Predators without any sort of betrayal after the crisis ends. It’s just a fun watch, even if it lacks a lot in depth. - Inviso
Where the hell was Linn Kurosawa? - JONA
A shameless cashgrab movie that pits two famous extraterrestrial races against each other for silly reasons.
Basically everyone just now notices that there’s an Aztec temple buried under Antarctica, and a team of cliched adventurers are sent there so they can be brutally murdered by both sides of the alien conflict.
A lot of the movie is presented with an air of mystery, which is a fucking stupid idea when said mystery is essentially spoiled in the damn title of the film. - Karo
It was fun action so it was somewhat entertaining to watch. Didn’t really stick around in my mind and I will probably forget all about it soon but I was entertained while watching it. - Prof
Manages to get almost nothing right from either series. Think of it not as "Alien vs. Predator" but as "Big Unknown Monster vs. Big Unknown Monster 2". That won’t improve the quality of the film, it'll just make you less mad at it for ruining what was left of two good franchises. Well, one good franchise and one franchise that people fondly remember for some reason passing human understanding.
Rating: 23/100 - Scarlet
A brainless film that has more human emotion in their alien species than the actual human characters which might as well be blocky enemy cannon fodder in a PS1 game. It has some decent action scenes but honestly you could replace any element of this film with another franchise and basically get the same result. Not a big fan. - Snake
23. Underworld (2003) 140 points
Scarlet: 11
Inviso: 15
Karo: 17
JONA: 28
Snake: 33
Prof: 36
It's kind of like Blade if Blade weren't interesting. Nothing ever really clicks as mostly you feel like the entire movie is one fight scene revolving around one problem. That being said, its not without its fun as the choreography and fight scenes can be pretty entertaining. That's not a recommendation at all, just a reminder that not everything about this is awful.
Rating: 53/100 - Scarlet
This one is much less a horror movie than it is a supernatural action movie. And I’m okay with that. Do I wish the color scheme was a little better? Yeah…it’s a bit too dark for my complete enjoyment. But still, the premise is interesting enough. You’ve got a cabal of elite vampires facing off against a cabal of elite werewolves, and the stakes actually feel like they mean something, as opposed to the stupid bullshit we got in Twilight, which feels like it just wanted the forbidden romance aspect of this movie and not much else. It’s amazing though, how everyone is scumbags and no one really gets called out on this until the very end…but whatever. It’s cool enough as is, and the action scenes (particularly at the climax) make this an enjoyable movie for the over two-hour runtime. - Inviso
Basically the vampire and werewolf tribes are fighting a war that lasted a thousand years. There's of course a forbidden romance between the two sides, though that relationship is barely touched upon so we can spend nearly the entirety of the 2 hour plus runtime with everyone punching, kicking, slashing and shooting each other in a manner I'm sure the director thought was 'way past badass, dude'.
This movie is obsessed with the appearance of 'coolness' to an almost laughable degree, be it ridiculous slow motion acrobatics or everyone being dressed in leather and black trenchcoats bought straight from Vlad's Gothic Fetish Emporium.
They even take the inherent awesomeness of vampires and werewolves and mess that up, as everyone mostly fights with machine guns like they are playing Call of Duty with horror-themed skins.
At least it is better than Twilight. - Karo
WAKE ME UP INSIDE (I CAN'T WAKE UP)
WAKE ME UP INSIDE (SAVE ME) - JONA
It's 2 hours of Kate Beckinsale in leather shooting and kicking a bunch of things. Becomes a bit repetitive after awhile.- Snake
Well it had some cool visuals and an impressive world. Completely felt like a Masquerade rip-off only made boring. - Prof
22. Ginger Snaps (2000) 127 points
Karo: 12
JONA: 17
Snake: 20
Scarlet: 21
Prof: 23
Inviso: 34
The story of a teenage girl werewolf, with lycanthropy apparently used as a metaphor for puberty or something.
The two weird goth girls were pretty awesome, and their sisterly relationship was the heart of the film.
But things really fall apart near the end as we trade all emotional depth for just 'rawr I'm a werewolf!'. Oh hey, kids are being hunted by a monster in an area with poor lighting! Oh look, we barely see more than a few flashes of the beast so we cant see how bad the costume is!
Such a disappointing finish. - Karo
The movie has a nice small indie vibe to it but it takes too long to get to the transformation. - JONA
There's an incredible werewolf transformation in this (still doesn't beat The Howling) and I like the lead girls a lot, but the puberty stuff is a bit on the nose. A lot of stuff in this film is done better elsewhere but it's a fun little film. - Snake
It's entertaining for what it is, but it just can't shake the feeling of being one of those movies they use as filler at two in the morning on a premium cable channel. Maybe you have to be a big horror buff for this to work properly, but I didn't really see what was so clever about it. The puberty analogies are underlined and circled and highlighted to the point of distraction, and the slackly-paced direction doesn't enliven proceedings much until the third act, which manages to be tense in spite of the terrible effects, and for which I bumped up my score a bit. Isabelle's pretty good, but Perkins is just terrible.
Rating: 31/100 - Scarlet
The obsession with death was kinda cool and I liked how the sisters had very different outlooks by the end of the film. Fairly entertaining even though it didn’t do anything special. - Prof
Yeah, not even a few minutes of uncomfortably attractive wolf girl make-up will make me enjoy this movie. The acting is terrible (to the point where I feel like the cast was told this would be a horror/comedy and behaved accordingly) and it just comes across as supremely cheesy at all times. Seriously, every character outside of the main duo comes across as a poorly-written cliché, but that doesn’t even matter because we don’t get any decent closure by the end of the film. Douchey guy just randomly wanders off after being cured, nice guy gets unceremoniously axed, mom and dad are in the wind. It’s super dumb. - Inviso
21. The Village (2004) 124 points
Karo: 3
Scarlet: 10
Inviso: 12
Snake: 23
Prof: 37
JONA: 39
There's this old-timey village that exists in the middle of some woods that supposedly harbors bloodthirsty creatures. The people there live a simple existence, with some weird customs that help add to the mood of the film and build the suspense.
The true twist involving the village itself is masterfully hidden by keeping the audience focused on the monsters for most of the story.
It is probably Shyamalan's most underrated movie. - Karo
Decent for a Shyamalan movie, which may not say much, but this is one time when his slow pace and overly formal dialogue actually work. As a thriller, there needed to be a lot more than a couple dead chihuahuas to intensify the fear. I actually didn't hate the twist, but I did hate Ivy; Bryce Dallas Howard has to be the most unlikable actress of the last twenty years.
Rating: 59/100 - Scarlet
M. Night Shyamalan gets a bad rap for this movie. Not for other movies that come after this one, because Lord knows Avatar, After Earth, The Happening and Lady in the Water are bad. But I feel like people shit all over The Village from very early on, and it’s actually a pretty solid film. Especially once you know the twist. What starts out as your standard period piece with a bit of a supernatural element turns heartbreaking when you learn it’s all the work of a history nerd trying to spare a victims of violent crime support group from further pain in the modern world. Suddenly the over-the-top old-timey acting makes sense: it’s a bunch of history nerds trying WAY too hard to emulate the past. Add in some intrigue in the story and you’ve got an enjoyable movie that shouldn’t just be lumped in with the rest of Shyamalan’s crap. - Inviso
A whole film should never have to rely on its twist to be good, but in the case of Shyamalan films, I feel like he's way too reliant on the device for his films to work. The Village really builds up amazing atmosphere throughout the film like most of Shyamalan's (good) work, but your liking of the film will hinge on one part of it all: the ending. I think it's decent, but it's way too easy of an ending that doesn't feel entirely earned. I love the costumes and scenery, but the dialogue and script doesn't give its talented cast much room to work. With some tightening up in a few spots, The Village could've been something so much more, but still the tension and dread at some moments make this still an enjoyable watch.- Snake
Yay old days /s. There was nothing scary about this and the twist was incredibly dumb. No thanks. - Prof
Don't let the controversy of the twist being bad fool you; the rest of the movie is also bad. - JONA
20. The Grudge (2004) 123 points (91 tiebreaker)
Inviso: 7
Karo: 21
JONA: 23
Scarlet: 23
Prof: 24
Snake: 25
There are a lot of comparisons to be made between this movie and The Ring, and I feel like ultimately, The Grudge does a better job as a horror movie than The Ring does, and that makes a huge difference in my enjoyment. The very concept is just more unsettling in the best of ways. A house that, if you so much as enter it, will send a vengeful spirit to kill you. It might be right then and there, it might be a day later, it might even be a week later. The point is that the house WILL find a way to murder you eventually, but not before it fucks with your mind just for fun by sending the spirits of its inhabitants to haunt you. The way the movie was edited felt great too. Obviously following Sarah Michelle Gellar in a linear path would’ve been boring, so flashing back to other victims kept the movie fun and fresh. Overall I really liked this one. - Inviso
Some house in tokyo had a pair of gristly murders occur in it, and so now it is full of bad juju that kills anyone who enters (except when it doesn’t, like with the paramedics).
The suspenseful parts where the monster is hunting her victims are very well done, but unfortunately the story is an incomprehensible mess where someone might have been a stalker and possibly was murdered for it but maybe not and she now wants to kill random people including for some reason the guy she maybe loved.
Despite taking place in japan, a good three-quarters of the main characters are americans who just happen to live there 'because'. - Karo
The movie had potential but the atmosphere isn't there and it ends up being forgettable. - JONA
Decent use of flashbacks to introduce the backstory, but the handful of clever scenes couldn't redeem the bulk of the film. Every haunted-house movie is a spoiler for this one (including itself as it uses the same devices incessantly). I can only conclude that it was designed to surprise people with poor memories.
Rating: 27/100 - Scarlet
It was decent. Not really a fan of the non-linear narrative though. Still once it got late enough in it to start making sense it was fairly entertaining. Didn’t do a good enough job of keeping my attention at first though. - Prof
It's really meandering and the original Japanese film is a lot better with its atmosphere; some things just got lost in translation with this American remake. Japanese curses are still amongst the scariest of horror film concepts though; I just wish it had more interesting characters and did something else with the standard haunted house concept. - Snake
19. The Descent 123 points (84 tiebreaker)
Inviso: 8
Scarlet: 18
JONA: 19
Karo: 20
Snake: 27
Prof: 31
This movie has one major flaw, and that’s the fact that so much of the cast is interchangeable fodder. I don’t mind horror movie fodder, but at least make the cast SOMEWHAT diverse. That being said, this movie is awesome. It starts out with a husband and child getting impaled in a car crash, and soon transitions into a fear of the dark/fear of enclosed spaces. For the entire first half of the movie, you think it’s horror in a man (woman in this case) vs. nature sense, and then the plot shifts in a completely believable fashion. It turns out some scary shit lives in caves, and the ladies start getting picked off one-by-one. But the best part is that the monsters don’t even really get 40% of the victims…that’s ALL on them. It’s just really well-done from a psychological perspective, and from a horror perspective. - Inviso
Almost looked promising until the creatures showed up, with only the gratuitously gory beginning a clue as to how far the film would "descend". The Descent fast plummets from an atmosphere of building dread to being laboriously conventional. It's as if the guy thought "okay, I've got a good premise so far. Now how can I take this and turn it into every cheesy horror movie you've ever seen". I wish they would give big budgets like this to horror filmmakers with some grasp of reality.
Rating: 40/100 - Scarlet
Forgettable women get killed in this somewhat memorable movie. - JONA
This bunch of dumbass bitches decide to go caving in an unexplored cavern without telling anyone where they are going, and of course they end up trapped.
At first we are given a tense, riveting race against time to find another exit to the caves before their lights run out of batteries. Unfortunately, we then go off with them running into unmemorable subterranean monsters and all realism goes straight down the toilet. It turns what was shaping up to be an excellent psychological thriller into 'dumb-looking creatures hunt people in the dark'. Being trapped underground is already a terrifying concept, there is no need to randomly toss fucking Gollum into the equation.
The biggest descent here is the one the movie takes into forgettable mediocrity when it could have been so much more. - Karo
I know this is hailed as one of the best of the decade, but it's honestly really forgettable with some generic female characters we don't really care about and some equally generic monsters we don't care about. It does some alright psychological stuff at first, but it devolves and unravels fast. - Snake
While it had some intense moments it was boring until the cave in happened and even after it did there were still boring moments throughout the film. Didn’t really enjoy it. - Prof
18. Drag Me to Hell (2009) 115 points
Snake: 6
Inviso: 13
Scarlet: 15
JONA: 18
Karo: 28
Prof: 35
Take the campy humor Sam Raimi learned from the Evil Dead series and combine that with a super fun gypsy curse set-up and you have one horror film that's incredibly gross, creative, hilarious, and endlessly rewatchable. Alison Lohman portays a very personable everywoman, and Lorna Raver's Ganush is simply a creepy, disgusting delight who's actually a pretty underrated horror villain. Drag Me to Hell is paced incredibly well, I like watching what Christine has to go through to battle the curse, it's very methodical and interesting to watch. One of my favorites of the decade with memorable characters and even more memorable moments, with a fucking killer of an ending. A+ work from Raimi. - Snake
I liked this one, but it didn’t light my world on fire the way people talked it up back when it came out. I mean, the protagonist is extremely likable. Like, she’s a good person at heart who spends much of the movie getting crapped on by the world, even before the gypsy curse is placed on her head. She’s a very understandable and relatable character, and it makes you cheer for her and want her to succeed. Beyond that though, the concept is very interesting. It’s just one character trying to overcome a curse that’s set to kill her off, and everything she tries to do ultimately fails, right up until the twist ending. I wish it was a LITTLE less clichéd in the acting though. So many of the characters (beyond the main character) come off as one-note stereotypes, which isn’t great in a more serious setting. - Inviso
This movie is a mess with its mixed tone and an absurd number of jumpscares but it still has some entertaining moments. Also, how disappointing that the cat was not eaten. - JONA
This lady gets afflicted with a gypsy's curse, which manifests itself by inflicting her with silly jumpscares every ten seconds.
More often than not the producers seemed like they were trying to disgust the viewers rather than frighten them. An old lady trying to french kiss the protagonist with toothless gums isn’t scary, its just fucking nasty.
The twist at the end is well done, but the movie was far beyond salvaging at that point. Any attempt at real gravitas is impossible when we get subjected to such stupidity as talking goats, demons doing irish jigs, and falling anvils. Yes, you read that correctly, in a serious horror movie someone gets a goddamn anvil dropped on their head. Th-th-that's all folks! - Karo
Okay first off why does it have to be romani people doing the cursing. Second off seriously why does it have to be over a third request for a mortgage payment delay being denied. But mostly importantly why are parts of this movie extremely campy and others attempt to be serious scary? It feels like it couldn’t make up its mind on if it wanted to be a comedy or not. The story was pretty fucking boring also and that just all makes for a fucking waste of time. - Prof
17. The Exorcism of Emily Rose (2005) 103 points (71 tiebreaker)
Inviso: 2
Karo: 10
Prof: 17
Snake: 19
JONA: 25
Scarlet: 30
This was an EXTREMELY good movie that I’m glad I finally got to watch. It’s not even your typical horror movie so much as it’s a suspense thriller that has supernatural elements to it. I love courtroom dramas. They’re inherently fun to watch for me. But giving a supernatural tone to it was fascinating. I feel like the actions of the two chief attorneys were realistic, given the craziness of the situation. And even the “horror” aspect, though relatively downplayed, was intense. The stretches and lengths through which Deb from Dexter put her body just to portray a possessed victim? That was great. I just loved the way this story was told, rather than your standard “here’s some spooky shit, and let’s follow Emily throughout the movie until she dies” kind of story. - Inviso
A courtroom drama about a priest on trial due to an exorcism going terribly wrong.
Basically his lawyer has to try and prove the existence of demonic possession in order to acquit him, thus bringing the most supernatural elements ever into a court of law that didn’t have Phoenix Wright present.
The movie is at its best when it is in the courtroom, and it really shines when it is trying to be that type of movie. However we also get all sorts of silliness with it trying to be a generic horror movie as well, from flashbacks to the exorcism to the priest's lawyer being haunted by spirits. Honestly, it would have been just as good of a movie if not better if it had been left more ambivalent if Emily was really possessed or not. - Karo
I really like how the movie was very inconclusive on if there were actual demons or if it was just a medical condition. That was really well done. The entire courtroom aspect and it being all flashbacks was also really entertaining. A very well done film even if I am kinda disappointed with the verdict of guilty but not serving time due to time served. - Prof
This is an interesting experiment for a horror film, putting the exorcism horror on the backburner and instead focusing on some intriguing courtroom proceedings. The flashback sections are a little uninspired however. It's often a more interesting film than it is a good film, but there's still something worth watching here, especially Carpenter's performance. - Snake
An ok movie if you want to see Debra Morgan speak gibberish and do some weird poses. - JONA
You gotta love a movie that goes out of its way to not only turn a real-life murder into a cheap horror movie, but also to exonerate the real-life murderers. ...Oh, wait, no you don't.
Rating: 20/100 - Scarlet
16. Cloverfield (2008) 103 points (66 tiebreaker)
Inviso: 3
Scarlet: 3
Prof: 7
JONA: 26
Karo: 30
Snake: 34
I’m willing to forgive the obvious flaw of this movie (why the FUCK is Hud so dead-set on filming everything, even though there are several scenes when he’s explicitly told to put the goddamn camera down.) You know why I’m willing to forgive that flaw? Because the movie is awesome. They keep the cast small and we get some decent characterization of the six main characters. You feel for their plight and their actions make sense, including Hud and Marlena kinda serving a minor comic relief role. The idea of a Godzilla-esque monster attacking New York and utterly wrecking everything for a bunch of yuppies is great. The monster itself, while dumb-looking, is still intimidating. And I actually really like the “found footage” style of this one. It helps to make the movie feel more intense and personal in this case. It’s really good. - Inviso
A completely enveloping experience. Once you suspend your belief at the premise, the scenes of disaster, the confusion, the terror, the bugs in the subway - it hits you hard. Not to mention that director Reeves uses the found footage device well to establish and create a bond with these characters so that we actually care about their peril. The final conclusion will leave you breathless. It's that good. Also, the best line of this entire list lands here – “Are you aware of Garfield?”
Rating: 85/100 - Scarlet
Woo more proof Found Footage isn’t always bad. Monster was cool, loved the way no one knew what was going on, and loved the irrationality it showed. Did Beth dying wishing she hadn’t called Rob so he might have lived? But more important and enjoyable than the characters in the movie and how they reacted was the concept of what the fuck actually is this monster and how the fuck did the DOD get the tape and all the other lore around this movie’s universe. I really can’t wait to see more and thought it was wonderfully handled to make me want more. - Prof
A romance movie got interrupted by a shaky camera and monsters that sound like Donald Duck. It's not the worst. - JONA
Basically a bunch of stupid young people in new york show us 20 minutes of boring and cringey home movies as they prepare a going away party for this douche who got a promotion and is moving to japan. Godzilla is angered by the prospect of this and attacks the city. Then everyone runs all over manhattan screaming while the monster skulks in the shadows so you can't see how bad the CGI model is.
The whole thing is filmed in an 'amateur camcorder' style, which gets real old after the first dozen camera-in-a-blender shots. - Karo
A nausea-inducing borefest with horrid characters, one of the worst uses of found-footage around with the shakiest camera ever ensuring you can never really get a clear look at anything in the film, and a monster with very little payoff or intrigue surrounding it. For good measure, it rips off anything it possibly could, including the Statue of Liberty head from Escape from New York and of course every and all monster films that have come before it. It tries to comment on human nature but it ultimately ends up a really weak and vapid attempt at conveying any sort of message. How this film got such an amazing follow-up in 10 Cloverfield Lane still astounds me. - Snake
15. Let the Right One In (2008) 102 points
Karo: 1
Scarlet: 8
Snake: 8
JONA: 15
Inviso: 31
Prof: 39
An incredible movie about the friendship and semi-romance between a bullied boy and a childlike immortal vampire.
The subtle relationship between these two sad and lonely kids (who both have acting skills way beyond their years) and how it grows over the course of the film is the real heart of the matter here, and what makes this film truly special.
As the truth comes out, the boy has to reconcile with the fact that his friend is a monster that must feed on human blood to survive, and eventually leads up to the most beautiful ending featuring a decapitation ever.
Yes, it is still a horror movie. Yes, quite a few people are still brutally murdered. But it is never just for the sake of it, there is real meaning here. This kind of mold-breaking is something the genre could use more of rather than just relying on tired and predictable formulas like so many horror movies do. - Karo
There are some really great scenes, especially the ending. Yet for me it managed to cross the plane of being overly artsy. While the shots are beautifully set up and the story is very subtle, that still doesn't make me care about looking at a Swedish kid with perhaps the stupidest hair ever walking a lot. So while I felt that made it drag for me, it still really was a pretty good movie. The infamous reveal is a little confusing and poorly executed.
Rating: 62/100 - Scarlet
One of the most powerful and original takes on the vampire mythology, Let the Right One In is a beautiful film about finding friendship and romance in the most unlikely of places balanced with brutal death scenes that serve to drive the main relationship home while still providing fear & thrills. Without our two lead actors, this film definitely would've been lesser; they're two of the best child actors I've ever seen, bringing their characters to life with a believability you would not expect. At its heart, it's not so much a horror story as it is a human story, and a very relatable one. it just so happens this is where horror works its magic best. - Snake
You let the right one in
You let the right one out
You let the right one in
And shake it all about
It is an okay movie
That just takes way too long
That's what it's all about - JONA
I feel like I might be culturally biased against this one, but it just felt off to me. Like, the whole time I was watching it, I felt like “Am I watching a Studio Ghibli movie with bloodthirsty vampires in it?” Seriously, it was a slice of life horror movie. And honestly, I’m not sure what exactly they should’ve cut, but they should’ve cut SOMETHING. The whole thing of Eli being *SPOILERS* a castrated boy? Completely unnecessary. The woman contracting vampirism? Could’ve been cut from the film without affecting much of anything. The creepy little blonde kid who was a bad actor having scenes with his dad for some reason? Could’ve been cut. I feel like this movie had POTENTIAL, but it just padded itself to a bloated runtime and that really cut down the scariness or even the plot development. It COULD have been good and it’s a shame it was mediocre. - Inviso
Boring ass love story that was about as much of a horror movie as fucking Twilight was boring as fuck. There was nothing scary about vampire Eli in the slightest and nothing entertaining about Eli’s and Oskar’s relationship. - Prof
14. Trick 'r Treat (2007) 97 points (59 tiebreaker)
Snake: 3
Karo: 5
Scarlet: 13
JONA: 16
Prof: 25
Inviso: 35
Always been a sucker for anthology films, and Trick 'r Treat happens to the best one ever made in my opinion. What other anthology film can keep up the quality of each segment while simultaneously providing a very enjoyable shell story (well except for Southbound)? This film is an appropriate love letter to the holiday of Halloween, embracing the darkness that makes up the day but also teaching us the importance of the holiday's traditions. Sam usurps Michael Myers as the holiday's legendary deity, as he acts like a watchful spectre making sure things go the way they're supposed to. He's the perfect representation, a dressed-up trick 'r treater with the powers of our favorite horror film villains. But Trick 'r Treat isn't all about Sam. One of the darkest parts of the film, the school bus flashback, is super disturbing, very cruel and a downright spine-chilling story, and it circles back around to the end of the film in a clever way. We get a fun werewolf story that does the whole puberty thing better than Ginger Snaps. Trick 'r Treat is definitely required viewing every Halloween now. Unless you want to incur the wrath of Sam. - Snake
A series of intertwined stories set during halloween in a pretty fucked up little town. Most of the little tales have a twist to them, and are lightly salted with humorous elements that never interfere with the horror at its core.
The presentation is done with a certain 'style' that makes it more memorable than garden-variety members of the genre.
There is great subversion of one's expectations throughout the movie, and this is exactly what horror at its most basic form should be about. - Karo
This is getting far too much credit. Just because a movie has multiple interweaving storylines it does not mean it's automatically a great film. I will admit it is far better crafted than almost ever other horror film out there but let's be honest there is little decent competition in the genre. I should say that I don't want to sound like this is a bad movie. It isn't, it is a decent horror film. But anyone telling you it's a great film needs to see some really great films.
Rating: 52/100 - Scarlet
A neat way to do a bunch of different stories but the movie was too mean-spirited and not that funny. - JONA
Some of the stories were really well done(the old bus driver). Some were boring as shit(the serial killer principle). Overall it ended up being eh but had some great moments that kept it entertaining. And comic book opening and closing certainly helped a bit. - Prof
I know horror anthologies used to be like, a THING back in the eighties or nineties or whenever, but this movie is just complete B-movie material. The stories are stupid, and it’s like watching an old episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark…except with a little more blood and gore. That’s how childish it is. Bunch of little bastard children scare an autistic girl and then get murdered by a bunch of ghosts. Great. Guy from Spiderman 2 turns out to be a serial killer training his son to be a serial killer. Yawn. Stupid and pointless bullshit climax? Yawn. Werewolf girls turning completely unsexy by ripping skin off. Yup. Just another bad horror movie. Only funny thing was how little of a shit the movie seemed to give about the fact that it had Anna Paquin in the cast. That was amusing. - Inviso
13. Martyrs (2008) 97 points (52 tiebreaker)
Karo: 6
Prof: 8
JONA: 12
Snake: 15
Scarlet: 17
Inviso: 39
This is about some young girl who escaped from her brutal kidnappers and now that she's grown up she is out for revenge. Lucie is a very interesting character, and every scene with her and her best friend is very well done. The audience will repeatedly question the her sanity and who is the real psychopath here.
Later on we are introduced to Team Martyr, an evil organization that tortures young girls in order to glean info about the afterlife. Though this angle had a lot of potential, it is unfortunately here that the movie stumbles badly. Instead of learning anything more about these wonderfully twisted people, we instead spend the rest of the film watching a girl getting punched in the face repeatedly to the point where one begins to wonder if we are indulging some sexual fantasy of the director. Yikes. - Karo
Goddamn this was depressing. Such a horrible group of people to do that. The emotions watching this gave me was a work of art by its creators. Beautifully well done. - Prof
Arguably, the most effective movie on the list in terms of horror but it made me feel apathetic to the movie itself. It also feels underdeveloped. - JONA
French horror is arguably the most brutal and realistic of all forms of horror, and this is both a strength and weakness. Martyrs believes heavily in its characters and speaks out against the kind of torture girls and people like them go through on a daily basis in the real world, and it drives that point home with scenes that put all the Saw films to shame. It's powerful and moving and a great character study, but at times it feels like it devolves yet into another torture porn film. Luckily, the positives way outweigh the negatives with some amazing psychological scenes. - Snake
Brutal and unforgiving and from the start I could tell this wasn't my type of film. For the first 30-45 minutes or so, however, I was intrigued. It rose a little bit above your average shock horror and made me wonder where things were going. Then it took a turn to just plain disgusting, trying to veil it's horrific attraction to torture under the pretense of slightly less horrific curiosity. The idolization of victimization is just a way of justifying its twisted mindset.
Rating: 40/100 - Scarlet
Fuck this movie. The visuals at the end are disgusting. But worse than that, this is just a massive fuck-up in storytelling. The first HALF is actually rather decent. Little girl escapes torture and hunts down her abusers. Unfortunately, the movie shot its load in the first half with the girl getting complete revenge and only leaving the weirdness of her hallucinations to sustain her until suicide. From that point on, the movie goes to shit. The secondary character becomes the main character and is treated to a 45-minute montage of her being force fed green shit and being smacked around by a bald dude. It’s extended torture porn for torture porn’s sake, and it’s really fucking dumb. The plot and the shadowy organization are pointless and stupid. Seriously, fuck this movie for wasting what could’ve been interesting in the first half on this dumb, gross-out shit. - Inviso
12. Session 9 (2001) 96 points
Snake: 10
Inviso: 11
JONA: 11
Karo: 16
Scarlet: 16
Prof: 32
I admit I did not like this film upon first viewing, because it reveals its hand very slowly and sometimes takes a long time for anything to happen. But watching it again, Session 9 has some amazing atmosphere and some compelling characters, as they go through some of the worst psychological torture imaginable. The abandoned asylum itself feels like a character, and what eventually happens to Gordon is very dark and very scary. It's an unsettling look into the human psyche, and one of the best psychological horror films in the genre. - Snake
This movie wasn’t perfect, but for the first movie on the list that I’d never actually heard of before, it really managed to impress me. There’s a small enough cast that each character could be well-developed and feature a strong personality, which made finding out what happens to them all the more intriguing. I also love how the setting amps up the spook factor, but it’s ultimately not related to anything. (Well…MAYBE. I guess possession is possible given that things only went bad after Gordon visited the asylum on the initial runthrough.) It’s just a scary setting that makes the view think it’s important, when really, it’s a complete misdirection. What gets me is that they could’ve made this movie so much lazier, but they didn’t. And that means a lot. - Inviso
Really good atmosphere and has an interesting storyline but the characters are underdeveloped and I can't say I really buy the ending. - JONA
So these guys are called in to help renovate a notorious abandoned insane asylum, and of course nothing bad could ever come of this.
After some lengthy insight into the asbestos removal industry, one of them goes crazy and starts killing everyone. Or maybe he was crazy all along. Or maybe he was possessed by a demon. Who the fuck knows, it wasn’t explained very well. - Karo
I think what makes Session 9 so odd is that it keeps its very mystery as much a secret as it does its solution, eventually revealing both at once to the effect of great confusion and little satisfaction. It rather meanders until then, trying very hard to build dread and tension, mainly through scenes where expectedly jittery old tape recordings are played. The recordings are psychiatric interviews of a blatantly cliché and unrealistic caricature of a split personality, so they don't do the job.
Rating: 42/100 - Scarlet
This movie was too slow. Once the nephew found Hank it was really entertaining but until then it was just boring and the good part was way too short for this to be any higher. - Prof
11. [Rec] (2007) 94 points
JONA: 7
Prof: 12
Karo: 13
Snake: 14
Scarlet: 22
Inviso: 26
The movie does a good job of conveying panic and confusion. Also, the camerawork here actually helps the movie instead of hinders it. - JONA
This was a wonderfully done movie. It was intense as fuck and the found footage really worked well for the story and making for the intense atmosphere. I love the idea of the apartment eventually get breached and the tape being leaked. Also the demon infection was just so incredibly creepy in visuals. - Prof
A zombie virus outbreak is captured by a local tv news crew, and the incident is presented to the audience in a reality tv manner similar to the tv show 'Cops'.
One thing that helps set this apart from similar 'real camera' movies is that the character is a professional cameraman with a professional camera, which means the usual shaking, pitching and yawing employed to make the shots seem 'amateur' is greatly muted.
As a pure horror movie, it does very well at capturing the unbridled essence of terror, and is one of the few films on this list that was actually SCARY, as opposed to being just gruesome or startling. - Karo
Found footage can be so hit-or-miss with me but the way [Rec] does it is very masterful. There's such a palpable sense of horror and human panic and the grittiness of the camera footage without being overtly barf-inducing is a huge plus. I love the main protagonist too, she's a good focal character. - Snake
REC] is a funny movie, but it's not supposed to be. It contains characters I didn't care about, is shot in a way that actually hinders its jump scares, and its hysterics lightened the mood too much for it to be effective as a horror film. The actors are all fine, and it has a few moments that will make you jump, but there's no sense of dread and the explanation tacked-on at the end was unnecessary.
Rating: 31/100 - Scarlet
I first saw this movie when it got repackaged in America as “Quarantine.” Yes I’m aware they’re two completely different movies, but Quarantine pretty much copied REC’s plot beat for beat. I wasn’t a fan of Quarantine, and watching REC does few favors for it. It’s intense, sure. I like the idea of a group trapped in an apartment complex because the government won’t let them leave due to potential infection. But at the same time, the movie’s pacing is just weird. Like, you spend the first half of the movie slowly building up the tension. Violent shit is going down, but the trapped occupants have no idea what. That’s good. But then, as the cast starts getting picked off, you have the problem with a lot of locked room scenarios…the numbers start shifting to the “zombies” and suddenly everything is just running and screaming with a shaky camera. It’s just too rushed after the halfway point to sustain what made the first half charming. - Inviso
10. The Ring (2002) 87 points
Snake: 5
Karo: 11
JONA: 13
Inviso: 14
Prof: 16
Scarlet: 28
Still in my opinion one of the scariest films of all time, Samara Morgan coming out of the TV will forever terrify me to no end. The whole concept of a haunted tape has been around for awhile, in many forms. The Ring takes this to a new extreme though, instilling fears of limited life, uncontrollable urges & circumstances, and conspiracy/paranoia right into your very psyche. The Ring remains a dread masterclass throughout, with a palpable danger always and a time limit to give things a frenzied, horrifying urgency. I love the mythology of the film; the unnatural origins of the tape, the circumstances of Samara's death. Sometimes mystery is good, but discovering the origins of the tape along Rachel was a far more compelling story. The Ring is still one of the only films to give me that pit in my stomach that so many others don't; maybe it's that idea of taking something we all enjoy (TV/Film/Etc. represented by the tape) and twisting it to dark ends, destroying that comfort zone. Its an unsettling experience and all-together there's something very Lovecraftian about it and it's something all horror stories should aspire to. - Snake
There exists a videotape with the power to kill anyone who watches it. No, it isn’t the VHS release of Baby Geniuses 2, but rather a creation of the vengeful ghost of a little girl was dropped down a well.
There's a chick who has to solve the mystery behind the tape before time runs out and she and her son die. This aspect of the movie is well done and interesting, and the time limit adds to the suspense.
This is a western remake of a japanese movie, which means every single character is now caucasian. So much for cultural diversity. - Karo
Has a good atmosphere but it can be quite boring at times. - JONA
Aside from the ending, which I’m not entirely satisfied with due to how strange the explanation is, this is a pretty good movie. Honestly, it comes across as more of a thriller than an outright horror film, and I kinda like that. It allows for the mystery aspect to be fully explored as opposed to just having constant death for the sake of death, as in many other horror movies. Yeah, the deaths still occur in bizarre fashions, but still, they don’t cheapen the plot because they’re few and far between. The one thing I really don’t like is the obnoxious little kid. Why the FUCK do little boys in horror movies act like such little shits, seriously? Fuck those motherfuckers. - Inviso
Man the opening to this film was so trolly. I love it. Watching Rachel investigate was pretty great. The tape itself was rather disappointing though tbh which was the weakest part of the movie. But everything was good and decently scary so points for that. And then that beautiful evil ending where she learns to sacrifice someone else to save her son. - Prof
The Ring is a film that doesn't make a lot of sense, and as a result, isn't wholly watchable. There are a couple of cheap thrills involved, but since it doesn't follow logic, whether it be ours or its own, it fails. It tries to be primarily a mystery film, but there isn't much of a mystery here, apart from the reason that a scary tape made in 2002 would be on VHS instead of DVD. I guess our demon was working with a budget.
Rating: 21/100 - Scarlet
9. Saw (2004) 77 points
Inviso: 4
JONA: 4
Karo: 9
Prof: 19
Scarlet: 20
Snake: 21
For a low budget movie, this is absolutely astounding, and it’s no wonder it spawned a massive franchise (that admittedly had quite a few misses among its number.) The premise is fascinating: a serial killer who gives his victims a chance to survive, if only they’re willing to endure some form of punishment to test just how much they want to live. But within that premise, you get some solid acting from the entire cast (and you have to feel somewhat bad for Adam, who was ultimately fucked regardless of what he did.) I feel like this movie is unfairly maligned for spawning the “torture porn” horror genre, but it’s not even torture porn beyond a few gruesome scenes. I just really like everything about this film. - Snake
With good atmosphere, a good mystery and interesting characters, the first Saw movie can be quite thrilling. Even though the series is known for its torture porn, it doesn't come off that way here as it is not the focus and isn't as graphic as other movies on the list. - JONA
These two guys are imprisoned in a sadistic game by Ben Linus as he tries to manipulate them into killing each other.
This makes for some intense psychological conflict, though often it seems the two of them keep going from trusting to not trusting each other and vice verca a bit too abruptly as the movie unfolds. I mean, Jigsaw just literally said to the other guy 'kill him or I'll kill your family' and then you immediately go like 'hey bro, let's get through this together'? C'mon now.
There are many mysteries and revelations that help keep things movie forward, and an ending that sadly leaves us with more questions than answers. - Karo
This was pretty damn good. The twist of who Jigsaw really was is impressively well done and it goes a good job of building tension. - Prof
I love the concept behind Jigsaw, but my taste for this series lives and dies with him. I have no care to see anything outside of what little character development is given towards him, and the pointless gore and "clever" traps grow tiresome very quickly. Cary Elwes is cool though.
Rating: 34/100 - Scarlet
Surprisingly subdued compared to sequels, with actual characters and a plot. To me though, it's all pretty serviceable and lacks any real memorability, aside from the pretty great twist at the end. - Snake
8. 28 Days Later (2002) 72 points
JONA: 2
Scarlet: 4
Prof: 6
Snake: 13
Karo: 23
Inviso: 24
First off, this movie looks like shit but that's okay because it fits the setting and makes a good contrast to the ending. The main characters are all likable and I wanted them to succeed. The movie is more about the characters than the zombies (yeah, I said it) and that's a good thing. There are some scenes which are just excellent with good cinematography and a great soundtrack. Just a great movie. - JONA
Though it pretends to be something other than a zombie movie, it isn't. Funny that it would pretend otherwise too, because it is one of the better zombie movies out there thanks to the fact that it's actually pretty serious and well made. It's amazing what talented actors can do to a ridiculous concept. One of the better takes on the zombie idea I have seen. It might be full of the typical clichés of the genre, but somehow still manages to surprise the viewer like few I have seen before due to a great atmosphere. Great film from Boyle, amazing performance from Murphy.
Rating: 73/100 - Scarlet
Fucking animal rights activists causing the world to go to shit. The deserted London was pretty fucking awesome to see. The picture of him as a kid with the writing on the back was very sad as was the rest of the time at his house. :( It was really nice to see Eccleston. <3 evil Eccleston so much. The ending was really fucking awesome. Fuck yes for Jim, Selena, and Hannah making it. - Prof
A completely revitalizing of the zombie genre, with a committed performance from Cillian Murphy. It has strong characters, an amazing apocalyptic London atmosphere, and a certain visceral quality to the camerawork and cinematography. One of the strongest zombie films around. - Snake
The world ends when animal rights wackos release monkeys infected with the 'rage' virus, named thus because it makes everyone mean and angry.
There's this guy who was comatose in the hospital who wakes up 28 days after the apocalypse, and he's basically who the movie is about. He meets a handful of other survivors, who in all that time have not managed to scrounge up a weapon stronger than a machete.
Everyone then does unfathomably idiotic things like trying to drive their little car over over a pile of wrecked vehicles in a dark tunnel, or nearly getting themselves killed by busting into a restaurant looking for food they didn't need. Hey, you know what your group should really be looking for right about now? How about a fucking assault rifle!
Later on, the guy who recently spent 28 days in a coma with his muscles atrophying somehow turns into Solid Snake and takes down an entire platoon of trained and heavily armed soldiers barehanded, and then releases a zombie into their compound that conveniently manages to kill everyone except the two people he was trying to save. Why don’t you have him lasso the fucking moon while you are at it. - Karo
This one is hard for me to rank, because it’s not a BAD movie by any means. But for whatever reason, it just doesn’t resonate with me. It feels like if someone took the entirety of The Walking Dead and condensed it into a two-hour movie with fast zombies. That is to say, there are some interesting moments, but it’s mostly slow and unpleasant. I think part of that is the relatively small cast. There are only five (six?) protagonists and one (two?) of them get little characterization before death. The bad guys, meanwhile, are just randomly evil and fill the “the humans are the real monsters” quota of most zombie fiction. It’s not BAD, and I like the idea of the virus being fast-acting enough that a droplet of blood can fuck you over…but it’s just a bit slow. - Inviso
7. Dawn of the Dead (2004) 70 points (47 tiebreaker)
Scarlet: 7
Inviso: 9
JONA: 9
Karo: 14
Prof: 15
Snake: 16
There’s a certain amount of charm and comedy to be had, and the plotline is grandiose and silly enough with broad, overreaching acting performances that make it a love letter to the Romero films from which it apes. The mall setting is fantastic and allows the film to stretch out and play with its concept and storyline well. The thrilling variety with which Frank West dispatches his undead foes makes this one a must-play for any fan of the genre. I highly recommend Dead Rising for purchase.
Rating: 63/100 - Scarlet
I know this is a remake and it’s nowhere near as praised as the original, but I just don’t care. There are far too many zombie movies out there that focus on how bleak things are and how depressing life is and how rough everyone has it. Like The Walking Dead, for example. That’s fine for a drama that happens to feature zombies, but sometimes you just want a fun action film involving zombies. Sometimes you want a colorful cast of characters who still have a spark of life to them and who are adapting to the zombie apocalypse and making the best of it. The whole montage of life in the mall manages to overshadow the crushing depression of a father getting bitten and subsequently killed. It’s great. AND it has just the right amount of blood and gore, ultimately proving really really fun to watch. - Inviso
Hey it's the best Zack Snyder film, even though that says nothing. Just a generally fun zombie movie even though it starts to become mindless action towards the end. - JONA
A bunch of survivors hole up in a shopping mall after the undead overrun the world, and what follows is your typical zombie survival story, with very little to make it really stand out.
It's kind of just Walking Dead: the Movie in the way it examines how people react to the stresses of the world ending, and for the most part is very solid at what it does. - Karo
The best part of this movie is the development people go through. CJ going from just wanting to survive and being willing to kill everyone else to eventually sacrificing himself is amazing. And that damn hidden bad ending in the credits. - Prof
Lacks any true bite or satire of the original film, but I'll be damned if it isn't still a very fun zombie film that does plenty of things with its setting to keep you glued and entertained the entire time. The characters are a tad generic and forgettable. This has one of the best openings of any zombie film as well in my honest opinion. - Snake
6. The Others (2001) 70 points (38 tiebreaker)
JONA: 3
Karo: 4
Inviso: 10
Prof: 10
Scarlet: 14
Snake: 29
This movie nails the atmosphere and has quite the style. The mother and kids are intriguing and the twist is quite good. - JONA
This starts out as a rather generic haunting story about a mother and her two kids that live in a big a spooky house and all sorts of weird things happen. But as we near the end, the film finally delivers its payload: that all this time we've been watching a haunted house movie from the point of view of the ghosts!
This kind of brilliant twist is something that absolutely makes a movie. All throughout you can see hints at the true nature of the situation, and they way everything fits together and makes sense at the end is beautiful.
Besides the reveal, the scene that really stood out was the one with the disappearing curtains. Anyone can make the dark scary, but making the LIGHT an object of horror? That takes talent. - Karo
From minute one of this film, there’s just a creepy and ominous atmosphere. From the setting specifically forbidding light, to the ever-present mist surrounding the house…to the creepy as fuck little British kids…this movie is unsettling. And honestly, the big twist reveal just makes everything “work”. This could easily be your standard ghost story, but I feel like the way the entire film (including Mrs. Mills and company) is handled really sets up that there’s something off from minute one, which culminates in an outstanding finale. There are some good scares too, but the movie is far more psychological than anything else, unravelling more and more of that creep factor with each passing minute. - Inviso
I loved the twist of the main people being the ghosts. It was fucking amazing. Such a wonderful twist. - Prof
I don't think that The Others is worth your time, as it has too many lulls that go on for far too long. It builds a solid atmosphere, but doesn't do much with it. It has good performances and is very simplistic, which works to its advantage, but I lost focus as it was playing. It almost redeems itself with some late-game plot twists, but sitting through over an hour and a half to get to them simply wasn't worth it for me, despite being very well-executed.
Rating: 51/100 - Scarlet
All I ever hear about this film is the twist, the twist, the twist, the twist. Everything before it though feels slow and shoddily paced, despite some solid atmosphere and acting. I think people give too much credit to the twist though. - Snake
5. The Orphanage (2007) 56 points
JONA: 5
Scarlet: 6
Karo: 7
Snake: 9
Prof: 11
Inviso: 18
The atmosphere in this movie is really good. The characters are all likable and it has an interesting mystery. The ending and reveal really stand out. - JONA
Starts off with a bang, keeps you in suspense the whole time, but the ending was a little much. It should have ended with the chilling discovery and the very mortal aftereffects, rather than continue on into other side. Why add a happy ending to the perfect ending? It would be like if Han Solo was encased in carbonite and then Slave One crashed into Vader's ship on takeoff, releasing Han from his freeze and in the process taking out the Empire. Ok, maybe not that extreme, but still.
Rating: 63/100 - Scarlet
This chick buys the big spooky orphanage she grew up in as a place for her family to live, only to find that it is of course haunted by the ghosts of murdered kids.
Her son has AIDS, which is apparently the only thing one needs to be able to talk with dead people, and he makes friends with the spectral children.
It's just a rather generic haunting tale, though Del Toro's excellent directing helps keep it from ever becoming boring. - Karo
With a fantastic Gothic influence and character building The Orphanage and creates something scary without going overboard. The horror comes from a psychological and real place with its characters, and exploits your expectations with deft creativity and gleeful trope playing. The score shouldn't be overlooked here, recalling 70s and 80s horror with modern sensibility. The Orphanage doesn't place a serial killer as its villain, instead it's a very emotionally touching story about a mother, a son, and disabled children. - Snake
Woo wonderful piano playing. Woo wonderful scary ghosts. I loved the mystery about the film and how we didn’t learn what happened to Simon until his mom did which was wonderful. The ending was also the perfect kind of evil depressing shit. - Prof
I don’t hate this movie, and I feel like this placement makes it seem like it’s worse than it actually is. It’s a solid movie. Not necessarily much of a horror movie (in fact, it’s kinda weird that there’s so little scary so much as it’s just unsettling.) The weird thing about this movie is how it uses so many obvious horror movie conventions, yet doesn’t really go for the scares with them. Like, the sudden appearance of ghost children doesn’t lead to weird and evil shit…it’s just benevolent ghost children that got fucked over by a lunatic wearing weird-ass glasses. It’s just strange. That’s the only way to describe it. It takes what should have been The Others and makes it…almost normal I guess. - Inviso
4. American Psycho (2000) 50 points
Snake: 1
Prof: 3
JONA: 8
Karo: 8
Scarlet: 9
Inviso: 21
The ultimate black comedy, American Psycho is an amazingly clever film in nearly all aspects. As a commentary on 80s greed and materialism, the conditions are ripe for this character, Patrick Bateman, performed brilliantly by Christian Bale in my favorite film role of all time. In the first act of the film, we get a few snippets of his life. We get a view into his nightlife and social life: his shallow friends define who Bateman is, confirmed by Bateman himself later when he tells his fiancee he just wants to fit in. We get a look into his morning routline, an extremely elaborate process filled with a laundry list of cosmetic products that Bateman rattles off through rote memorization without much care. This is where Bateman reveals that he is merely an idea with no singular identifiable personality, as he peels off a face mask, driving the point home. Then we see his work life, a job that Bateman clearly hates and doesn’t take very seriously as he slacks off in the office. Slowly, the film reveals to us Bateman’s blood lust, starting with a homeless man and his dog until he works his way up to a “friend”, Paul Allen, who mistakes Bateman for someone else in a commentary on the conformity of office fashion. Basically everyone looks the same; same haircuts, same suits, etc. Before he murders Paul, Bateman shares his “passion” for music, a rehearsed speech of buzzwords and shallow observations in a scene that has come to define the film in a way that’s darkly hilarious and also reveals how deadly and unhinged Bateman is. The song that plays during the scene, “Hip to be Square”, matches the film perfectly as the film speaks to the yuppie culture almost the same way the song does. The film gets increasingly more sick and horrific as Bateman kills more people, until the climax of the film where Bateman is just rampaging through the streets. Yet, the carnage Bateman yields is so much more than the mindless destruction suggests. Bateman is rejecting his reality here, breaking away from the labels and brands that define his everyday life. By the end of it all however, we are unsure if it really all happened, and we end with Bateman still not discovering himself in any meaningful way, trapped in an endless circle of business card measuring contests, dinner reservations and nights out at clubs. American Psycho is at once hilarious, scary, and deeply meaningful. It strikes a multitude of tones perfectly, and Mary Harron doesn’t skimp on any aspect. It’s almost a sympathy story for Patrick, despite his cruel murders and actions. And the way Bale puts his all into that performance still astounds me every re-watch; a man on the verge of breaking the thin visage of upper classmanship he carries everywhere he goes, who can’t help but to slip insane marks into conversations. It makes the film worth watching enough on its own in my opinion. - Snake
Patrick Batemen is a wonderfully entertaining sick bastard. And that ending is just still so fucking good. - Prof
Patrick Bateman is very entertaining and Christian Bale gives it all in his role but the movie can be quite repetitive. - JONA
An interesting introspective into the mind of a sociopathic wall street banker.
We go through the mundane aspects of his life as he tries to keep his psychosis from breaking out and revealing to the world what he really is. Most of these scenes are well-done and quite funny in a dark sort of way.
So many of Bateman's colleagues were these generic white guys in suits who look nearly indistinguishable, and it made so many scenes incredibly confusing. Some relief was had when Bateman killed the biggest offender, or maybe he really didn't, who knows from how that ending was. - Karo
Good, not great. It's a heavy-handed satire full of over-the-top violence. While this type of in-your-face exploitation is not usually my cup of tea, Christian Bale's performance is absolutely ridiculous and makes it essential viewing for the genre. His rapid-fire rampage through the spectrum of human emotions helps create one of the strangest, most memorable characters in modern cinema. Bateman's monologues and ending murder spree have become the stuff of dark-comedy legend. However, it really is an utterly ridiculous film that loses most of the satire of the original novel.
Rating: 60/100 - Scarlet
This one isn’t even so much a horror movie as it is a psychological thriller revolving around one guy’s descent into madness. Yeah, there’s killing, but the movie is less about that and more about just completely criticizing the guy’s lifestyle. How many times do people just not even give a shit who Patrick Bateman IS? Despite all the urban elite bullshit he deals with, he’s just some loser who we never see doing any of the work we’re to assume he’s being paid for. It’s just an interesting examination of the downsides of yuppies, and even if it’s not a real “horror” movie, I found it engaging for sure. - Inviso
3. The Mist (2007) 45 points
Snake: 2
Prof: 4
Inviso: 5
Scarlet: 5
JONA: 10
Karo: 19
The Mist, despite its grand premise of monsters in lurking in the unknown, ends up being a very simple film, a tale of man vs. man in a melting pot of clashing personalities and occupations. The Mist's biggest strength is its characters and their relationships with each other. As it takes place in a small Maine town, these are all people going about their daily routines and who probably see each other most every day. Thomas Jane plays a perfect everyman, David Drayton, a character who strikes me as a very realistic father and person in general. Marcia Gay Harden's Mrs. Carmody is one of my favorite film characters, a fanatical preacher normally seen as the town kook who ends up gaining followers to her side. It's funny what disaster can do to people, twisting their very perspectives and reality to something near unrecognizable. So, we get this clash of normalcy vs. zealotry and things quickly get out of hand as innocent people are sacrificed in the name of revenge. Realistic dialogue and natural acting bring the film to life, as well as Frank Darabont's amazing eye for setting and atmosphere. The grocery store, parking lot, neighboring drug store, all feel to have a strong presence to them. They aren't just nebulous movie locations; everything is connected in a meaningful way and the grocery store becomes a cozy safe haven even amongst the crazed crowds. There's plenty of Silent Hill sensibilities here; the obvious everyman vs. cult leader, foggy town, and even the monsters feel like Air Screamers from the original game. It's a scariness that can't help but work; it invokes what we all fear the most: the unknown, helplessness, and of course, ending up with humans as the scariest ones of all. - Snake
This fucking movie. The fucking ending. Holy shit. David is so going to be fucked in the head for the rest of his life. It was also just a great exploration of humanity and their attempt to survive a nightmare. Beautifully well done. - Prof
Holy SHIT that’s a good ending. Dark, but good as fuck. Really, I love this movie. Watching it now after The Walking Dead has become a cultural phenomenon is pretty awesome, because you get to see Andrea, Dale and Carol before they got famous. The whole concept is great, with people being trapped in a grocery store and having to face off against monsters while the people inside begin going stir crazy and turning against each other. And then you have Mrs. Carmody. Holy SHIT this is a good character. At first, she’s just your small town religious zealot, but then the terror sets in, and things start working in a way that match the shit she’s peddling. Suddenly, she’s the leader of the grocery store and is running the show up to and including human sacrifice. It’s amazing to watch people devolve at her behest. It really is. And I’m glad the movie didn’t pussy out with a happy ending after everything else (and hell, after agreeing with Mrs. Carmody for a good portion.) - Inviso
I had the ending spoiled for me before I saw the film, but I still enjoyed it. Some of the effects are weak and the monsters can come across as a little cheesy - but this is more of a social commentary and psychological/suspense thriller rather than a jump-out-of-your-seat horror flick. The performances are raw, emotional and believable. If you haven't already heard how this ends and are looking for a tense movie that isn't afraid to kick you in the gut when you're down, check it out. If you do know how it ends, just accept Thomas Jane screaming very loudly for what it is.
Rating: 67/100 - Scarlet
Pretty entertaining throughout the whole movie, even though the ending fucking stupid and makes no sense. - JONA
An experiment gone wrong opens up a portal to the spooky fog dimension, and a small new england town becomes a feeding ground for unimpressive CGI alien beings.
Every character is ridiculous, exaggerated, and extremely argumentative, to the point of everyone feeling like internet trolls rather then real people.
Soon, some of the people have to leave the supermarket where everyone is holed up because for some reason it only took two days of hardship before majority of the survivors begin ritual sacrifice to appease Cthulhu.
The car they are driving eventually runs out of fuel, which is what tends to happen when you don't stop for gas. They are barely in this state for more than two minutes before deciding the best course of action is pull out the gun and shoot everyone through the fucking head. There was no sign of creatures nearby, and they had no information about their surroundings, but everyone's first thought is 'hey lets commit mass suicide!'
This turns an ending that was probably meant to be tragic into one that was just really fucking stupid. - Karo
2. Zombieland (2009) 30 points
Karo: 2
Prof: 2
Scarlet: 2
Inviso: 6
JONA: 6
Snake: 12
A bunch of eccentric outcasts band together after the dead overrun the world and provide a comedic take on the old zombie trope.
Everyone is crazy yet strangely believable, from the pedantic nerd and his 'zombie checklist' to the trigger-happy junkfood-loving southern redneck to the kickass shotgun-wielding 10-year-old girl.
It's character interaction at the very best. It's Arrested Development in the zombie apocalypse. It's Zombieland, motherfuckers, and you better hide yo' Twinkies! - Karo
You have Emma Stone, Woody Harrelson, and Jesse Eisenberg. Uh yes good cast. And then you have a zombie apocalypse where they take the time to have a 12 year old girl who hasn’t seen it watch Ghostbusters. Amazing. No but seriously I just found the film so enjoyable and hilarious. The Jesse Eisenberg narration was great as always and I loved the way the rules popped up. Everything about Bill Murray in this film was also fucking hilarious. Just a really enjoyable and entertaining laugh fest with some fun zombie slaying action. - Prof
Zombieland is a excellent horror comedy with many original motives and themes. It’s just a hilarious zombie flick that relies on clever situations and genuinely funny awkward comedy rather than the typical "so bad it's good" fashion that's common for "horror comedies." The "rules" and the beyond funny Bill Murray cameo make this whole. Woody Harrelson is a riot in this one, garnering most of the laughs. The "Twinkies" gag almost never gets old in the course of the 81-minute running time. pus-spewing zombies plus slow-motion, first-person kills are always fun. Overall the most fun I've had at a cinema in a long time.
Rating: 86/100 - Scarlet
I’m so glad that the last movie I watched for this list was something light-hearted, given the plethora of ultra-violence this list has had on display as a whole. Zombieland is just cute and fun all the way through. It doesn’t take itself even remotely seriously, and that’s a great thing, because horror comedy can open up the horror genre to people who would otherwise have sticks up their asses. From scenes of a little old lady dropping a piano on zambambos, to a fifteen minute sequences of just fucking around with Bill Murray for no reason…the whole film is lively and energetic and leaves a smile on my face. The only reason it finishes outside of my top five is because that’s ALL it is: light-hearted fun. There’s pretty much no plot whatsoever. And a good horror movie with a good plot is still better, especially when there’s one even better horror comedy ranked higher on my list. - Inviso
The characters are fun and enjoyable but the jokes never really hit anything out of the ball park for me. - JONA
A very, very funny movie with a lot of original takes on the zombie genre despite being a parody of it. It has some really funny and memorable characters even if they're a little archetypal. I like the emphasis on rules, it's what I usually remember most about the film; "double tap" is my go to rule for any zombie game now! You can never be too sure. Well, I remember that, and Bill Murray's downright excellent cameo, seriously one of the best cameos of any film. It's truly laugh-a-minute, but one thing I could complain about if I had to is that the danger and horror elements are too downplayed. Sometimes a little bit of focus on serious scare moments makes other moments even funnier in my opinion. Whatever the case though, Zombieland is excellent and well worth the watch. - Snake
1. Shaun of the Dead (2004) 23 points
Inviso: 1
JONA: 1
Prof: 1
Scarlet: 1
Snake: 4
Karo: 15
This is not just one of my favorite horror movies, but one of my favorite movies. Full stop. I dressed up as Shaun for Connecticon one year. I had red on me and everything. THIS is how you do a horror parody, Wayans brothers. You have to actually like the thing you’re parodying and find ways to instill love in your movie, rather than trying to make every scene just jokes and homages. It’s an interesting comedic premise: what if a bunch of slacker losers tried to survive the zombie apocalypse. And it works REALLY well. Simon Pegg and Nick Frost have GREAT comedic chemistry. The plot is solid while still managing to work in comedic twists to your standard zombie fair. This movie just does EVERYTHING right. EVERY. SINGLE. THING. - Inviso
Shaun of the Dead is JONA's #1 confirmed.
This movie is just hilarious but it has other aspects which shine as well. I absolutely love the cinematography in this movie and in Edgar Wright's other films. It really does make things funnier. The characters are great and there are some surprisingly touching moments. - JONA
God yes this movie. It is just a hilarious movie with zombies. But of course there are also some very touching moments. And all together it is just a wonderfully amazing film. The Don’t Stop Me Now scene is one of my favorite things ever in a movie. - Prof
Clever, funny, highly rewatchable. 'Shaun of the Dead' is a love letter to the zombie genre, and the love flows out of the screen in abundance. Pegg and Frost are magnificently disarming in this bromance, with Nighy and Moran making excellent use of their supporting characters. Mixing the zombie setting with English suburbia is a masterstroke, and it's dificult to think if a better comedy film in recent years.
Rating: 90/100 - Scarlet
I best describe this film as one that has its cake and eats it too. The way it balances its horror and comedy genres is nothing short of perfection. It loves both; it interjects small moments of danger and horror that make the comedic scenes that much more funny. Take the Queen scene; there's a clear presence of danger throughout the scene, but it still provides a hilariously memorable moment despite that. That's just amazing craft. Then there's all the little touches; Shaun's morning routine gets zombified without notice, the TV that provides exposition with the flipping of channels, Shaun's Winchester zombie plans. It's one of the most clever films ever, and the way it balances horror and comedy both make it king for me. - Snake
This british numbskull and his friends end up in a zombie apocalypse and have various misadventures.
Everyone has no fucking clue what to do in case of zombies, but somehow they manage to miraculously live more than 10 minutes so they can escape to the safest place to be during the end of the world, a british pub.
The movie is meant to be a comedy, and although it has its moments the humor is generally very hit and miss and most of the characters begin to wear on the nerves the longer the film goes on. - Karo
Thanks to everyone in the Gauntlet Crew who participated and anyone else who followed and read along. I had a lot of fun running it and reading your thoughts on these various films whether negative or positive and definitely want to host another in the future. Despite some overwhelming negativity for the genre at times, I do feel that at least everyone got some enjoyment out of a few at the films at least which makes this enough of a success for me. See you in the next one!
This was the final outlier:
Inviso: 368
Prof: 328
Snake: 274
Karo: 244
Scarlet: 216
JONA: 197