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Who is Nidoran F?Edit

Nidoran F is good for one and one thing only. Yeah, we know it, men. Good ol' TJF, The Jug Factor. Look at the honkers on this bab-... What? Nidoran's the small one? Oh, well... That changes everything. What does she do? Mostly everything her male counterpart does, yet less effectively? ...And she won't even make him a sandwich?! Frankly, I guess Nidoran F is then good only for filling your party early on to make it look large and terrifying. Though, really, Nidoran F can be considered a good early edition. Good, that is, if you completely ignore anything else that you can catch in the area. But what about her POISON BARBS?! you may say. The only way to reply to that is: Heheh... You said Barbs.

Pokedex entries:

Ruby: NIDORAN has barbs that secrete a powerful poison. They are thought to have developed as protection for this small-bodied POKéMON. When enraged, it releases a horrible toxin from its horn.

Sapphire: NIDORAN has barbs that secrete a powerful poison. They are thought to have developed as protection for this small-bodied POKéMON. When enraged, it releases a horrible toxin from its horn.

Emerald: Its highly toxic barbs are thought to have developed as protection for this small-bodied POKéMON. When enraged, it releases a horrible toxin from its horn.

Fire Red: Though small, it must be treated with caution because of its powerfully toxic barbs. The female has smaller horns.

Leaf Green: Although small, its venomous barbs render this POKéMON dangerous. The female has smaller horns.

These entries are accompanied by a picture of Nidoran F humping the ground:

http://img172.imageshack.us/img172/4453/029pj2.gif

And yes, I stole these from www.Serebii.net. Why? Because Nidoran is a common, minor Pokemon that nobody cares about. Want me to make something up? Fine... Scenario time!

At the beginning of the game, the player is taken upwards to Viridian city. This city sucks, and is very boring due to its lack of a gym leader and old men who lie in the middle of the road because there is no coffee around. But one redeeming feature is that there is a potion hanging on a tiny tree that you can get.

Oh yeah, and there are Nidoran Fs in the group of patches of grass. Like a hundred of them. All crammed into like 20 patches of grass and apparently nobody can see them coming, hence the term "random" encounter. The n00bish player may catch a few Nidoran F, thinking it's really cool, and try to force it to have sex with the Nidoran Ms that they find there. They may do so by putting the Nidoran next to each other in that menu where you order pokemon that nobody uses because they only use their starter:

http://img167.imageshack.us/img167/3024/032zb7.gif http://img172.imageshack.us/img172/4453/029pj2.gif

Yeah, man on top. He likes it rough. I don't care if they aren't touching. A real Pokemon enthusiast can image that Nidoran M getting lower... and lower... and lower... Yeah, ride that filthy, filthy Nidoran F... You're a dirty girl, aren't you? Mmm....

...

Or maybe they'll do something stupid and walk a bit north of the patch of grass and right the RIVAL (hereby known as BIFFLON).

"HA!" The n00b may think, "I have a bunch of n00bish Pokemon like Nidoran F and you only have two!"

Said n00b will be owned by a Spearow (A Spearow) and the BIFFLON's starter. They will realize that the pokemon caught in that area suck and stick them in Bill's PC so they can go catch some CENTWAUR, a real man's Pokemon. And maybe a Nidoran M... Yes, notice the M. M as in MAJORLY BETTER. In fact, next time I catch a Nidoran M, i'm going to name him MAJOR PFFFFT. Sorry girls, this is just a case where the male is better. ...And oddly more arousing. Still, Nidoran F is likeable. Really, honest! Can't you see it?!

Even through all of her shortcomings, Nidoran F was successfully nominated into the tournament by nothing more than a fad rally that spanned quite the cluster of boards. Mrs. Zolom, if you will?

"...Why the hell am I the blue one?" - Nidoran F on her own design. Not an actual quote, but we all know the thought exists. Much like Nidoran M's "Why the hell am I the purple one?"

Hey Weevil, check it out, my Nidoran F is horny. - A slightly altered Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged clip, because no matter who you are, you can't deny how awesome that quote is.

(Writeup courtesy of ZenOfThunder; Sexy flair added by SlightlyEroticPigeon (1-800-SEPSEX))

Nidoran F's Contest HistoryEdit

Win-Loss Record: 0-1

Summer 2006 Contest - Spazer Division - 8 Seed

  • Spazer Round 1 --- Lost to (1) Samus, 21180 [18.15%] - 95533 [81.85%]
  • Extrapolated Strength --- 53rd Place [18.15%]

Nidoran F was the one rallied joke character to make it into the field, unless you count the bonus match. One things got serious however, Nidoran expectedly got crushed. I'm convinced LUE vote-stuffed the poll a bit and that she should have done much worse, but it matters not. Nidoran F will likely never see the field again.

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