John Tanner is the protagonist of the game Driv3r, and is notable for being, well, wholly unnotable - he's generic in every way, from looks to name. For whatever reason, Tanner made the field of 64 in the 2004 contest, pitted as a 15 seed against Solid Snake. The ensuing massacre remains one of the worst blowouts of any contest, and the all-time extrapolated stats have Tanner squarely at the bottom, where even the worst of fodder - like Q*Bert - would be predicted to break 80 percent on him.

In 2005, people began to call Agent 47, another virtual unknown on Board 8 who nevertheless made the year's contest, "Neo-Tanner," and predicted that he would flop in a way that would make Tanner's performance look like that of one of the Noble Nine. 47 proved to be stronger than these predictions, and users seeking somebody worse than Tanner have found solace in the church of Jay Solano.

It has been predicted that if Gordon Freeman ever faced Tanner in a match, the universe would be unable to accept either character winning, and time would freeze before the end of the match, with neither possible future actually occuring. This has become known as Schroedinger's Match, and may be preferable to the fate that awaits the universe should GFNW be violated.

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