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Hilarious quotes by Luster Soldier, which he mostly said in mid to late 2007.

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The Best of Luster Soldier[]

  • Some people actually have a life, like me.
    (On why his Smurf Academy assignment was late, and why he deserved full credit despite lateness)
  • Dark Reversal (12:49:23 AM): I know someone from my school who was a cocaine dealer. He sold cocaine.
    Dark Reversal (12:49:54 AM): He told me the best ****ing drug overdose story ever.
    Dark Reversal (12:51:55 AM): Here's what happened: The cocaine dealer guy visits someone at his house and he was on LSD and smoking weed.
    Dark Reversal (12:51:57 AM): He sells cocaine to the guy and then he smokes a couple of rocks and then starts foaming at the mouth, vomited like crazy and then passed out.
    Dark Reversal (12:53:08 AM): No, he didn't. The guy who passed out snitched on the guy who sold him the cocaine and his father called up the police. The person who had the cocaine flushed it all down the toilet, but he still get busted by the police.
  • Dark Reversal (3:25:31 AM): I have to poop, damnit.
  • Dark Reversal (12:20:03 AM): You mentioned pikaness earlier (about 4 1/4 hours ago) on AIM. I have a few things to say about pikaness
  • Dark Reversal (4:16:33 PM): Oh man, Ryu is a pretty strong and muscular guy so pika would get vigorously ****ed by him.
  • Luster, how many times and ways would you **** Ryoko if I drove you to her place of work tomorrow?
    Dark Reversal: I don't know of any positions that I could use when ****ing someone. As for the number of times, maybe 2 at the most.
  • Dark Reversal: My greatest fantasy was going almost a month without (omitted) and then I had a wet dream while dreaming about pikaness in my sleep.
    Dark Reversal: I did it while sleeping in my bed.
  • I wouldn't give out my address in the chat. You'd have to contact me directly on AIM. Besides, I have stuff to do on 4th of July that doesn't involve ****ing Ryoko.
  • Dark Reversal: I wouldn't pay to have sex.
    Dark Reversal: I wouldn't get any money in return for the sex.
    Dark Reversal: Plus, paying money for sex is a little stupid. I want it free.
    Dark Reversal: It would be a little risky to have sex with her when she could recover either while I was still having sex with her or putting her clothes back on.
  • Dark Reversal (11:22:58 PM): Smurf got you pregnant?
    CrimsonOcean190 (11:23:34 PM): yes Luster
    Dark Reversal (11:23:45 PM): Crimson, this seems like a joke.
  • Crimson, are you really between a C and a D cup?
  • Icehawk9902 (3:02:58 AM): would you take it in the ass from neonreaper if it ensured you win every user contest for the rest of your life
    Dark Reversal (3:03:31 AM): No, that guy has sexed up a bunch of girls before. He probably has some STDs.
    Icehawk9902 (3:03:41 AM): lets pretend he has no STDs
    Icehawk9902 (3:03:43 AM): then would you
    Dark Reversal (3:04:18 AM): Hmm, tough one. I'll have to go with yes.
  • Icehawk9902 (3:09:23 AM): Would you... have sex with pikaness if there was a 10% chance you'd get a STD in the process?
    Dark Reversal (3:09:32 AM): Yes
    Icehawk9902 (3:09:57 AM): How about
    Icehawk9902 (3:09:59 AM): CrimsonOcean
    Dark Reversal (3:10:15 AM): Yes
    Icehawk9902 (3:10:22 AM): Ryoko, Inviso?
    Dark Reversal (3:11:01 AM): No to both of them. If I get proof they don't have STDs, then I'd have sex with both of them without using a condom.
  • Luster how much money would you pay to **** pikaness?
    Dark Reversal (2:17:29 AM): $50
    Luster how much would it take for you to pork Ryoko? moneywise
    Dark Reversal (2:14:52 AM): Hmm, probably $20.
  • Shadow Ryoko: oh
    Shadow Ryoko: that sounds so simple!
    Shadow Ryoko: but i'm scared to try it
    Dark Reversal: It couldn't be that bad.
    Dark Reversal: Tell me when you hit orgasm.
  • If I were to have sex, I wouldn't be screaming although I would make grunting sounds.
  • [01:32:15:AM] glifer 57: Luster do you want a picture of a girl sticking a mountain dew can in her *****
    [01:32:26:AM] Dark Reversal: Stingers, yes.
  • [01:33:10:AM] xXShadow RyokoXx: does pika's resistance make your ***** harder?
    [01:33:14:AM] Dark Reversal: Yes
  • zeppelin89sk: you cant see your face
    Dark Reversal: I can use a mirror.
  • I would chug a Mountain Dew before having sex.
  • I wouldn't **** a sock
  • I bet Ryoko couldn't handle my massive ****.
  • Are you a girl, because I'm a guy? I find it strange you call me a cutie.
  • Given that I'm a guy, there's nothing wrong with liking girls.
  • I have tried so hard to find a girl who does not have a boyfriend, but it just seems like most of them are taken already.
  • I have cool moves, alright. The names of my cool moves are the Crimpwalk, Raise the Roof, Harlem Shake, Shake and Bake, Bobble the Head, Pop the Collar, Brush the dirt off your shoulders, Moonwalk, and Ballin'.
  • Icehawk9902 (3:29:28 AM): pika has a wang, she;s a tranny
    Icehawk9902 (3:29:32 AM): how would you feel about that
    Dark Reversal (3:29:44 AM): I wouldn't mind that.
  • Icehawk9902 (3:14:33 AM): WHat do you think of black chicks
    Dark Reversal (3:15:43 AM): I wouldn't want a black girl to be my girlfriend because that is a little awkward. I don't have a problem just hanging out with one and talking to it.
  • Pixie sticks do not **** you up if you snort it.
  • That picture did not give me a hard on.
  • Smurf, you should take pictures of your sister near the end of her pregnancy and post them on Board 8.
  • I realized that chlorobutanol is a good sedative chemical to use because someone made a post on Board 8 saying that the amount of chloroform needed to knock someone out (without killing them) is very close to the amount that will kill someone. So with chloroform, it's hard to knock out Ryoko without killing her. If I kill her, I get charged with MURDER!
  • Dark Reversal (10:32:11 PM): SBAllen foiled my plan of getting a level upgrade tonight. I was hoping to turn level 32 about 1 1/2 hours ago.
  • I must say, when I saw that little 10 next to my username, I cried because the approval of this account to level 10 was something I did not expect.
  • I used what was called "bumping messages" to bump the topics.
  • You have to wait 5 minutes from the time of the last post in a topic before you can close it and that's assuming no one else posted in it until then. Just so you know.
  • Don't talk smack on GMUN by calling him gay. As for the furry part, you are free to do that because it's fun to watch.
  • XD, Ryoko has had sex.
    (No real context, but was spoken whenever Ryoko made a sex joke)
  • AKJ, it's the ****ing contest season. This isn't a time to be away from Board 8 because the contest season is filled with fun-packed action
  • Pleinair: If you haven't played The Floor Is Lava, you don't know what difficulty is.
    Luster: I couldn't find this game listed on GameFAQs, so I assume it's some online game (could be a flash game). I want a link to this game.
    B8: XD @ Luster
    Luster: I was making a serious request, which was to get a link to the game.
  • That's caused because I didn't have a girlfriend back then, plus I had to deal with raging hormones. And I still don't have a girlfriend yet.
  • yazzy: Have the Raging Hormones subsided yet?
    Luster: Not yet. But I will give a quick summary about the level of my raging hormones over the years:
    2003 - Very low. This is also the year I made my first account on GameFAQs.
    2004 - A decent increase over the previous year.
    2005 - Massive spike in my hormones occured during this year. This occured during the same year that jh316 claimed I harassed his home board.
    2006 - Hormone levels drop again, to being slightly higher than what it was in 2004.
    2007 - Hormone levels are going back up again, but they aren't nearly as high as what they were at in 2005.
    2008 - Another drop in hormone levels, such that it now lays around midway between what they were at during 2006 and 2007.
    B8: Thanks for that, Luster.




  • Luster asking Ryoko in the "b8anime" chat:

Luster Reloaded (10:45 am) Oh yeah, I wanted to ask you something about a post you made a few weeks back. There was a topic about what age everyone lost their virginity at. You ended up posting in there and said that sex hurt pretty bad on your first time. Was there blood coming out from your vagina from the "popping the cherry" act that occurred from having sex? This is assuming you still had a hymen intact at the time you had sex the first time.

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